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Taking charge of my well being!

Unknown userMember15 June 2016, 8:59 pm AEST

Taking charge of my well being!

Hello All,

I decided today not to go to hospital. I have a new psychiatrist, meeting a new social worker next week and I have another lovely social worker who meets with me, as well as a great GP who is always there for me.

I decided today that it is time to take charge of my well being myself. So as I am exploring new ideas I will keep a little diary here and perhaps it is useful for some other people that are struggling along the way.

I really want to look at the good sides of my life history. I have a lot of trauma to go through, but I don't want to forget the good times. So I made a random selection of photos of my husband. I want to make a scrap book and capture the love and the memories. In the book 8 Steps to Trauma Recovery there is a section about start with the end, or something like that. I made it through the trauma and I want to celebrate that I made it and capture the good times while I am feeling better. Over time I want to add my kids, my friends, my family, my uni years, my school years... whatever, one at a time, savouring the good times...

I know that just because I feel well today, tomorrow is another day. But it is ok, I will work on my ideas when I can. When I feel I can.

Big hugs to all x

332 replies

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In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

Unknown userMember21 July 2016, 8:52 pm AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

All the best @Former-Member. I hope you find ways to stay well 🙂

In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

Unknown userMember22 July 2016, 8:01 am AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

Hello @Former-Member

Thank you! I will try to make the best of it. Some time for some thinking, grieving, being angry.... or whatever feelings come up without the need to wear a mask.

In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

Unknown userMember22 July 2016, 2:27 pm AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

I think even in hospital I need to make a clear commitment to get myself better. I've been missing pretty much all of the program with exception to eating - I do that. Little by little, step by step. Exercised this morning so that's a start and tomorrow will restart week 3 of mindfulness. I am very tired most of the time. And I just wanna cuddle up and hide from everyone.

In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

Unknown userMember23 July 2016, 3:20 pm AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

Hi All

Just on my first unsupervised leave - feel like a teenager who's not grounded anymore!

Downside is that I haven't even left half an hour ago and I am exhausted and feeling unsteady. So I am sitting down, probably will call my adventure over and head back "home".

How are you all? Haven't been in touch for ages, but I am thinking of you. I've spent a lot of time in bed and ignoring the world the last few days... But I realise I have to change my attitude, to get the most if this program.

In response to: Re: Taking charge of my well being!

Unknown userMember23 July 2016, 3:57 pm AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

@Former-Member You are very brave in taking the step to go to hospital. I hope that you will get the help and rest that you need and feel comfortable there. I read that you feel like you just want to cuddle up and hide, that's understandable. I too only feel comfortable in my own home, so you are very brave.

Love and hugs to you.

In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

utopiaSenior Contributor23 July 2016, 4:04 pm AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

I remember when I was in hospital and they would encourage leave, I didn't really want or need to go anywhere & I found the crowds a bit overwhelming. So often I just sat in the park near the hospital and watched the kids play or people walking their dogs.
If I wasn't in a therapy group, I'd try to stay in the lounge area. I only went to my bedroom to do 'homework' or after 8.30 at night. Was bored a bit but found others to talk to when I needed a chat. However, the first 2 or 3 days I pretty much slept.
Give yourself some time. Things will become easier as the days go on. Am proud of you for taking this step

In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

Unknown userMember24 July 2016, 3:45 pm AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

@utopia

Glad to know you slept the first couple of days as well. I'm still exhausted, I think I slept 14hrs last night, only interrupted for meds & vitals.

@Former-Member it's definitely not home 😞

They've changed some of my meds, I googled it last night. Not happy.

I am trying to find a way to structure my day and to not feel overwhelmed. In reality they're only 3 one hour group sessions every day and I sometimes see my psych or counsellor - how can I feel overwhelmed???????? @utopia I pretty much hide in my room, haven't had more than a 2 sentence exchange with another patient yet. My desk is exactly in front of a mirror - somehow I think that is a shit choice that I have to see my miserable face all the time. I don't think I like myself very much today.

In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

utopiaSenior Contributor24 July 2016, 9:05 pm AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

Hi @Former-Member. Not a fan of the desk in front of the mirror. Who would not hate that. My old hospital room desk was in front of the window. There was a construction site occuring in my view at the time, but it was nice to get some sunlight shinning through.
I found a perfect spot in the lounge room when I could get the sunlight and not see the construction site.
I'm a smoker so I spent alot of time in the smoko courtyard. That's probably not the place for you.
I can't remember much of my first few days. Besides my MI -I was probably in shock and over medicated those first days.
I did discover I have a loathing for colouring in. It did the opposite of sooth me. But it worked wonders on others.
After a week, I developed a good relationship with 2 special nurses. They were very approachable & they helped me get out my frustrations, offer tissues and help calm me down. Nurses help more than other medical professionals.
Tomorrow hopefully will be better. Beginning of the week and groups to attend. And as much as you may miss your home, it's a bonus not having to think about cooking dinner all the time.
I truly hope you get a good sleep tonight and that you wake tomorrow -feeling it's a new day.

In response to: Re: Taking charge of my well being!

AppleblossomSenior Contributor25 July 2016, 4:47 am AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

Hello @Former-Member

I have been sleeping a lot and only on a couple of threads on the forum, so I didnt realise you had gone it to hospital.

At least you are getting an idea of what is available, and when you are ready to be able to take some of it in .. go to a group and see what its all about.

Take care ... good luck .. gently bently

In response to: Taking charge of my well being!

BlueBaySenior Contributor25 July 2016, 7:01 am AEST

Re: Taking charge of my well being!

Hi @Former-Member
I have been doing the exact thing in hospital - sleep and hide away under my blankets. Only communication is with staff and a quick hello to others who say hi.
I have wanted to run away from here a few times but the staff know it's my anxiety and depression talking and that I'm pretty bad.
I hope you get to do some group therapy today. I know I will be encouraged to go.
Anyway just wanted to say hi and thinking of you. Take care Xxxooo

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