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Something’s not right

It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor16 June 2018, 3:50 pm AEST

It's time I disappear

I've been struggling for awhile and today is a really bad day. I'm emotional overwhelmed angry at my BPD. Not coping. Im having thoughts to disappear fir a while where no one will find me.

I am so confused in my head.

I am thinking my family will be better off without me. I am a bother to then.

Pls tell me I'm wrong. Someone tell me to not do it.

Ir seems wrong but my head is telling me very strongly to do it.

Easilt psck a bag and go.

Fragile is how I feel.

97 replies

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In response to: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:26 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

@MDT

Are you still around?

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

MDTSenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:32 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

yep @BlueBay just watching Netflix atm how about you?

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:34 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Just got home watching the footy.

I just need to chat and no one is around. Is it ok?

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

MDTSenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:37 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

yeh @BlueBay
What footy did you go to?

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:41 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

No @MDT

I didn't go to a footy game I went to a work dinner. But just got home and watching footy. I barrack for western Bulldogs but they're not great this year. Do you barrack for a footy team?

Feeling really down I don't know what to do. Life is really difficult and it's hard to open up to people eith the truth. I get really scared.

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

MDTSenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:43 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

oh yeh i got confused @BlueBay

yeah i go for sydney swans in the AFL, always have since i was a kid coz im from sydney

Do you currently see a psych?

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

MDTSenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:43 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

PS don't have to answer that if you dont wanna

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:46 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

@MDT

Yeah I have a psychologist and a psychiatrist. It's hard work speaking to them every week and dealing with trauma from childhood sbuse. It's really hard. It triggers me so bad thst I then am bad fir a few days.

Ps. Your team is doing isn't it??

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

MDTSenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:50 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

At least you have support there @BlueBay and that is good.
I know what you mean about reliving stuff, going over it all the time. It can be VERY exhausting.
I think its important to take time out to have a break from all that. Tuning out is essential.

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

MDTSenior Contributor22 June 2018, 9:53 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

are you safe atm ?

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.