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Living with Ourselves

Sophia1Senior Contributor

Living with Ourselves

hello @eudemonism @eth @outlander @Bunniekins @Mazarita @Silenus @NameUnknown @Grasshopper3 @patientpatient @soul @Former-Member @Determined @Shaz51 @Former-Member @Friendconnect @Teej @utopia @Queenie @Appleblossom @Zam @perseverer @Janna @Owlunar @Former-Member @Former-Member

First of all I wanted to let you know that I have conversed with all of you at some stage on both sides of the forum..

It was my intention to close two of my threads and change my name in the kindest way for all of you...

I commenced this process on the 12th March and today is the first day that I have access to actually post or respond to anyone....I was in the last couple of days able to register a new name and like some posts...

I am so sorry that my profile ended so abruptly that was definitely not my intention....

In fact if I had done it my way.. instead of thinking would be better to be guided through the process....I would have just written on one of my threads my reason for closing my account tagging you all in....then requested account to be closed and username put to bed so to speak

I have chosen to take this path in order to protect my family's sense of safety .. privacy...health..

Please let me reassure you that this has nothing to do with any members on here...

I have tagged each and everyone of you because you have given me support and invited me into a little of your worlds...priceless experiences...I have felt heard and valued on here....Thank you all so much..

Moving forward ...this is who I am now and hope to be able to converse on the forum living in the now not the past...therefore no mention of my previous username necessary...

If you do not know who I am...that is fine also...perhaps all of the above is not relevant for you..

take care

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In response to: Living with Ourselves

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

@eudemonism I think we all feel like we were more before our MH took us down the dark road. I hope you get an appointment with your psychiatrist very soon.

In response to: Living with Ourselves

utopiaSenior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

@eudemonism

Your poem made me cry. I can relate to the words and feelings. The need to put all energy, all focus on getting good mental health & then to crash again.

Powerful words.

In response to: Re: Living with Ourselves

frogSenior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

@eudemonism my heart aches.

”I want more. I was more.”

sums up so much longing and loss 😢

Hope you can see pdoc soon.

Take care

In response to: Living with Ourselves

Unknown userMember

Re: Living with Ourselves

Hey all - I came this way after seeing a few little funny antics (thanks @Sophia1 and @Zoe7 - I do enjoy your sense of humor) but I can see that the conversation moved to some more supporting themes - which is just as wonderful to see.

@eudemonism you have articulated very well, some fairly difficult experiences that a lot of others can relate to here. Your poetic style is a beautiful way to communicate that. I hope that seeing that shared feeling does help and getting to speak to your pdoc soon too. I've sent you an email.

In response to: Re: Living with Ourselves

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

Thinking of you @eudemonism and @Sophia1

In response to: Living with Ourselves

Sophia1Senior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

Hello @eudemonism

I am catching up with posts from monday and sunday as was unable to spend time on computer...

That piece of writing is brilliant...

I can feel depth and expression of so many different emotions..

reminded me of hip hop ...expression of culture ...politics....

the health system is a part of politics...

Do you like hip hop music?

Sophia

In response to: Re: Living with Ourselves

AdgeSenior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

Hi @Sophia1 A warm hello to you...

I haven't been very active on the forums for some time, despite the best of intentions.

Just so tired, with little energy.

Adge

In response to: Re: Living with Ourselves

Sophia1Senior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

hello @Adge

Sorry to hear that you are still feeling so tired....you had that virus

have you been back to the doctor to make sure nothing else going on?

these days it is all about process of elimination which is a pain in the proverbial....

I was only thinking of you a couple of hours ago...I walked outside to catch some sun...am still feeling frozen...

Our yellow banksia rose caught my eye....in full bloom and looking lovely...

I have taken some photographs on my mobile but to not have the energy either at the moment to do any more...

There is also a brilliant pink pigface blooming....

one tree which I do not know what it is...very large in full blossom...one next to it showing beginnings of blossoming..

I was very saddened when I could not garden any more....

It used to depress me seeing all of the plants needing pruning and all of those persistent yellow soursobs...

Today I thought yes it is not how I would like....there is still so much to look at....so much life in most of the plants...the garden beds are all large...so I am talking about 3 acres which includes the house...back paddock 2 acres fenced off..

cooling off period of sale now finishing midnight tomorrow ...wednesday...

How is your garden?....spring has arrived....

off to lay down for a while...might catch you later or tomorrow morning I will try to log in...

take care

In response to: Re: Living with Ourselves

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

@Sophia1 @Adge I love Spring and seeing the flowers all bloom in the garden. I still have a lot to do in my garden but some of the more established plants are already in full bloom. My back is getting better slowly but I am not able to do much at one time so I have been trying to do a little section of weeding at a time (when the weather has been ok and I have been up to it). Gardening for me used to to relaxing too but there is so much to be done presently that it is a bit overwhelming. Hoping with the warmer weather coming I will be able to do a little more

@Sophia1 it seems that we amused @Former-Member with our antics the other day - good that someone got a giggle out of our frivolities - look forward to the next time we are both in the mood for a laugh

In response to: Re: Living with Ourselves

eudemonismSenior Contributor

Re: Living with Ourselves

@Sophia1 I only like music when I'm manic. Or drinking. And I've been either of these many times in my life. Listening to music is a bit futile after awhile. I'm not feeling real good today. I've got a nicotine patch on and have run out of smokes. I get paid in two days. It's a nasty cycle that never ends. I'm contemplating getting onto some oral tablets again. Mainly because I can't handle life that well. Have way to much time on my hands on have nothing I feel like doing. And I'm tired of dealing with my illness and side effects 😖

Eude
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