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The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

CheerBearSenior Contributor05 Mar 2018, 8:02 pm AEDT

The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Hi everyone ☺

I'm guessing lots of people out there have heard the words "it takes a village to raise a child". It's one I believe in but one it seems many of us can really struggle with for lots of reasons. For those of us living with extra challenges like mental health related issues, it makes sense that being part of a strong and supportive network could be really helpful. I have found though, that extra challenges can make it extra challenging to find and be part of an understanding and supportive 'village' (and sometimes the people in our village are part of the issues/challenges - it can be a bit of a catch 22).

Maybe we could build a virtual kind of parenting support village here where we can share some of the ups and downs of raising kids, celebrate the good times, support each other through the not-so-good times, and connect with others who might "get it".

Tagging@Former-Member @Bubbles3 @Snowie @Former-Member @health4s @kv22 @Scarlet79 @CrazyTiger @defeatedmumma @Former-Member @NameUnknown (with no pressure to reply - more so you're aware that this space is here if you'd like to use it) and inviting anyone who'd like to jump in anytime to come along ☺

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In response to: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Shaz51Senior Contributor28 Apr 2020, 5:22 pm AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

hugs and understand @Blep , @CheerBear , @Faith-and-Hope , @HakunaKhunz , @saltandpepper

love your profile pictures @Blep , @saltandpepper

In response to: Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

BlepSenior Contributor28 Apr 2020, 5:27 pm AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Thank you @Shaz51. Hope you had a lovely day 😁

In response to: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

saltandpepperSenior Contributor28 Apr 2020, 6:05 pm AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Thanks for the response @CheerBear he is 3 I still have plenty of time to adjust. I just can't even bear the thought of him being out of my protection though.

In response to: Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

saltandpepperSenior Contributor28 Apr 2020, 6:06 pm AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Cheers @Shaz51 big fan of fight club

In response to: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

CheerBearSenior Contributor29 Apr 2020, 5:49 am AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Yay @Blep! I hope you were able to get some you time in while he was asleep 🤞How long did he sleep for?

@saltandpepper there's not much that's as intense for me as my need to protect my kids and it's very hard to think about doing something that feels like it goes against that. Does he spend time with other family or friends without you now?

In response to: Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

saltandpepperSenior Contributor29 Apr 2020, 8:16 am AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@CheerBear I guess we are pretty limited with options there. He has spent time with my Dad without me and plenty of time alone with my partner. We really don't have a lot of people we can go to. I'm sure my brother would love to hang out with my son, but he just doesn't get time. Barely has time for his own family as it is. I must admit, initially, I really struggled even leaving my son alone with my partner. There's parts of me that are irrational and controlled by fear and it stems from my own childhood. It's not something I've had to really face until having my own child though

In response to: Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor29 Apr 2020, 8:21 am AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

I am in that zone at the moment with my disabled adult daughter @CheerBear @saltandpepper .

The situation with my soon2BX and his new partner threatens to undo a lifetime of social training for her . They are trying to immerse her in the company, and standard of activities / approach to care provided to the n.p.'s very young children (K - 4) for their own convenience. To achieve that they have to discredit her actual ability level and development of independence.

It's hard. There needs to be a level of trust that truth will prevail, but it sounds like you are managing very well with how difficult it is @saltandpepper ...... go you ❣️

In response to: Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

CheerBearSenior Contributor29 Apr 2020, 8:35 am AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

That is tricky if your options for having someone else look after your son are limited @saltandpepper.

I think having children makes many of us confront the way we have been raised ourselves and our early life experiences. If you've experienced things that scary and/or traumatic as a child, it makes sense that it could surface in a different way when you see the world through your own child's eyes. Do you have any support to work through your childhood? Professionals. family or friends etc?

There are parts of me that are controlled by fear too. Something that resonated with me, which you said earlier was that in a way, it has been helpful for you to have this vigilance (I think it was you that said this, I might be wrong). It's so difficult to learn how to let go when it no longer helpful to hold on or when you are in a situation where you have to let go, especially if it has served a purpose in the past.

@Faith-and-Hope sorry to hear you continue have difficulties with soon to be ex and his new partner.

In response to: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Unknown userMember29 Apr 2020, 8:47 am AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Morning @Shaz51 🙂,
Hope you are well? ❤️

In response to: Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor29 Apr 2020, 9:27 am AEST

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Well said @CheerBear ..... 💕. That self-awareness around childhood experiences brings us into that adult perspective, and helps us make decisions a

o we our children arhat hopefully support our own healing in the process.

@saltandpepper @Blep

Hi @Former-Member 👋💕

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