Niquas Notes

Hello Claire @outlander,

Okayish is Okay Claire Are the xrays of your hand/arm, where it got caught in the rope with the horse? It's good to hear that it will repair over time

Maybe I'm confused? I thought psychologists were doctors & it's the psycologist that I haven't heard from yet. I have an appt with my general practicioner next Wednesday. I hope that makes more sense 🙂

Love to you Claire

Hello Mazy @Mazarita,

I am doing better on this new day, still sad but the
anger & confusion is subsiding. I don't know if it's due to a few
tiny, lowest dose pills or if it's simply because I've
finally chosen a path, what I will do to try & help.

I'm glad you can see your dream as just a bad one, that
it didn't terrify you. My interpretation of it is that
your afraid that something is going to 'get you', something
beautiful & powerful; something that's not specifically
after you, it's just what that something does. I'd go as
far as to say you were dreaming about the enevitable, the
panther represents the deadly forces of nature.

Good to hear that you woke in a wakeful state, that sounds
like an improvement already. 8.30pm would be a little early
for me to go to bed, I would wake in the dark. My battle
is with a sleep pattern, so it's with both when I lay down
& when I get up. My nags to you are meant as gentle care,
I would never force you & I don't believe you can be forced.
I admire that about you.

I don't want the dose of this medication to be raised, I
do think it's helping & is benificial at this dosage. No
need to raise it, my mouth is doing ok, though my throat
is sore which I haven't had that reaction before. I'm fine
with that reaction, but I don't want it to get worse.

I'm finally able to take the critters for walks in the forest
again! I find joy within myself at the young fellas joy
when he runs. It gives me freedom to give him freedom.
It's not just the dogs that like the walk. There really
isn't anywhere else I can let him off-lead, his instincts,
though I have never encouraged them, have a very raw reality.
He is a very powerfully strong breed. It is why I chose him.

Love to you Mazy.

Hello Claire @outlander,

I've always wondered what a pdoc was, Thank-you for teaching me.

Oh my goodness, all that time you were sitting at that awkward dinner you had a badly injured hand! I'm imagining that may take a little while to heal too? I hope the doctors were able to ease the discomfort a bit for you, it sounds very painful!

I don't have any definite ideas about the rainbow planet, maybe oceans of swirling colours & every land mass a different colour to the next, with a bright yellow background?

Love to you Claire

Ohh the finger was broken @outlander , hugs my sister

Hello @Former-Member

no dramas @Former-Member i didnt know what it was to start with either.

yep been like it at the dinner party and the past 3 weeks after was told it was fine. just taking regular otc stuff atm.it seems to be going ok for the moment even though shouldve been on anti-inflames but cant due to stomach. falling apart from the inside

that sounds like a loveley planet, ill see about doing some more tomorrow. been stuck on it for ages and actaully spoke to mazy about it a few days ago too.

love to you too

thank you @Shaz51 hugs to you too

Hi Niqua, good to know that a little of the heaviness has lifted for you, and that you got through some of your domestic tasks today. Sounds like you have a clear idea of where you want to go with the new med too, which is great. The best thing of all to hear is that you have been taking the dogs out for walks in the forest again, and are finding joy in the young fellas antics.

I'm pretty bedraggled today after staying awake last night until about 4am. Recovery day today, most of it sleeping. Mood is okay for the most part (as long as I don't think too much about it).

Not sure what I'll do with the rest of the night. But sending lots of love to you. @Former-Member

Good Morning Everyone

Mazy @Mazarita,

Bedraggled with an ok mood is still ok Mazy, I hope you enjoyed your wakeful night I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing not to think about it much, but as long as it's your thing I support it. I know for me thinking about things too much, focusing on them, is a bad thing; but not thinking about them enough, blocking them out, is also a bad thing. I don't think I have what it takes to balance my thoughts, I think these pills are just helping me block them all out again. But it feels better, like it's smoothed off the sharp edges of a jaggered rock.

Sleep well Mazy

Hi Niqua, so nice to meet you in real time this morning. I don't think I will go back to bed yet. Solid sleep last night (with the usual couple of awakenings, but only short). Still very tired and quite sore this morning. But waking up thanks to breakfast, a couple of coffees. And meds may kick in before long to wake me up more.

So glad to hear you are getting some relief from the med you've started. I know what you mean about how it may block out some thoughts. Perhaps more, it just allows us some space from thinking about things all the time, which is not that helpful usually. Sometimes I feel ridiculous for taking so many meds. Most times I think they are my friends in helping with my mental and emotional struggles. I remember what I was like without them, and that was unbearable within myself, and for those closest to me to be around.

Wonder if you have any plans for today?

@Former-Member