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Niquas Notes

Niquas Notes

I thought I might try some 'journalling' . Just write a little blurb out each day, basically what I'm already doing . . . just giving it a name . . a title, I suppose? But to give it some 'umph' in my head I'm going to try & remember how to start a new thread & call it 'Niquas Notes' 🙂
It's not even 11.30am & I'm having a tomatoe & onion sandwich for lunch 🙂 I think I've been forgetting to 'get around' to a few meals lately. It's pretty good 🙂
I think I need to go into town today & check the post office, I may have a parcel to collect (evil ebay again!). I might get some meat while I'm in there (probably sausages ;)), I don't think I've had a lot of it lately - though I had Tuna in some fried rice the other night 🙂 Pretty sure I've got a couple of DVDs to collect from the library too 😉 {which means waiting until after 2pm at least as they close from 1-2pm for lunch} Today being Wednesday, it's an off-lead walk day, so I'll take the puppies along & drop into the local Forest on the way back home 🙂 I really enjoy that walk myself, it might be one I've done a million times, but that's sort of part of what I think I really enjoy about it?;)? & of the camp trips, beach walks & places that I have been going to for a little while now - the local 'home' forest walk still gives us the most freedom & me the most confidence 🙂
I think I am recovering from the xmas kerfuffle. I've just polished off a banana, which I would normally have at breakfast, so I've just combined morning & midday meals 😉 & I've got a bottle of water with just a touch of Apple Cider vinegar in it :x I actually quiet like the tang & I do beleive my insides appreciate it 🙂 I've been having quite a few nasty waves of nausea washing over me for a while now.
I need to start 'beating myself up a bit' about the housework! I did get some dishes done before I went away, but there's still a mountain of pots and pans there!! & my mountains of dirty washing are growing death defying peaks!!! I did also get 1/2 the yard mowed, but the other half is overgrown & the 1st 1/2 could do with a trim (00)! & the general clutter continues to compact.
I must look online at what the costs of registering my puppies will be in my council, maybe I can do that while I'm in town? If I got the genny going & started tackling the dirty washing, I could mow my little fella's feet inbetween cycles . . . & then we could go to a favourite 'look-out' spot for a walk 😛 . . . that'd be nice 🙂
Well, by the time I get online, it'll be past Potatoe hour. So I'd better stop blurbing & post 😉
Love to all that need or want it, everything positive gratefully accepted 🙂
❤️

520 replies

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In response to: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

Love you Claire @outlander

In response to: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

Good on you for making it clear to the doctor how things are emotionally for you, Niqua. I've been a mess in doctor's offices on many occasions too. So glad to hear you now have a new person who will help you in your real life, as well as us here on the forum. Wise to give her letter and notes, so that she had an idea what was going on, even if you weren't able to speak. Even in a very troubled state, you would have communicated a lot. Thank you so much for letting me know. Hope you can now wind down a little in that sometimes gentler space after a storm. Mazy @Former-Member

In response to: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

Love you too NN @Former-Member 🌻 💛

In response to: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

First morning after the first pill. It was a little hard to wake up, but not too bad. I'm on the lowest possible dose, but she mentioned putting that dose up tomorrow - that seems pretty quick. I haven't been on pills for years. I've tried many. This one's pretty new in this country, been in Europe for a few years. I looked it up, it's supposed to work quicker, it's just another anti-depressant - but that's ok, I said I'd try anything & I will. My goal is family counselling & if my daughter agrees, I've got to be able to talk in that counselling. I've got to be able to think. Something happened, phyically, in my brain during the xmas visit I think - the night sleep just didn't come; & it hasn't come right since. I think I slept 'deeper' last night. 3-4 months, I'm still focusing on the one thing, & yet that 'thing' has been staring me in the face for decades.

Love to Mazy & Claire @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Owlunar @Mazarita @outlander @eth @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

Morning @Former-Member .....

Thanks for the tag .....

Hearing you and hoping it all goes well. Good on you for seeking the family counselling ... so glad to see you reaching for support in this .....

💐🌿💕🤗

About to get my butt out of bed to go looking for coffee .....

In response to: Re: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

Good morning, Niqua. I had a visit from the rubber ducky this morning, first time in several days. Now sitting with my wet uncombed birdsnest in clean clothes and clean me. Phew. It is only the doctor's appointment this morning that got me in there to wash off the accumulated yuck of me.

Glad you are willing to try the anti-depressants again. Hope they give you some relief over time. Bear in mind that they usually take a while to kick in, though I hear that these ones you've been given are quicker acting, so that's great. Maybe the rapid increase in dose is related to how these ones work too.

Sending hugs and lots of love your way today, as always. Mazy

@Former-Member

In response to: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

Good work Niqua. I hope they work out for you and things start to go your way soon @Former-Member 💕 love and hugs 💛💛

In response to: Re: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

Good morning @Former-Member sending warm wishes your way. I hope the ad dose stabilizes soon for you and that it really helps you get better rest and more clarity and courage to go into the counselling if/when it happens. Brave you for wanting to give it a try. I think it's a good idea.

In response to: Re: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

That's a good start @Former-Member - and that "one thing" needs to come out in the open for peace. Well done and hoping the counselling helps bring about the latter and heals your family dynamics 🌹

In response to: Re: Niquas Notes

Re: Niquas Notes

@Former-Member I really hope your doctor and new psychologist can walk well with you. There is an effect called "white coat anxiety" where fear of medicos raises our heartbeat etc etc... that would have added to your stress as well as the difficulties that you had to discuss. Yep I write notes to help remind me in case my scrambled mind forgets what I was there for. Still do ... next to the appointment ... no shame in it.

Glad you have done it. I agree with @Mazarita put yourself in the picture as well as wanting connection with your daughter. Her situation is complex as there are so many children.

Give yourself credit for your achievement of getting away from an abusive relationship. You live in a lot of harmony with nature. That is a wonderful trait.

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