Angry and alone

Thanks @Phoenix_Rising and @Appleblossom for your replies. It means a lot that you'd reply.

@Phoenix_Rising I've had to try and assess where the thoughts were coming from because there's no other way to bring them up with anyone if I can't assure them that they're perfectly harmless. Given how undesirable it'd be to receive the first knee jerk reaction from someone who doesn't understand the full context

I guess I don't usually condone violence. Thinking about it logically, I don't want violence to occur to the people I care about, and since everyone is someone that somebody cares about then it follows that it's mutually beneficial for there not to be violence. But I don't know, people's reaction to it just seems fake and over the top and at the moment I find myself siding more with the perpetrator than the victim (motivation aside - usually the motivations turn out to be less than ideal) or no sides but for the pure animal instinct to compete and be on top.

I haven't figured out a good outlet for angry feelings yet. It's good that you've got your yard to work it out on.

aaaand I'll have to come back to this cause I need to go out for a bit.

Edit: I do have some ideas of stuff for angry feelings. As a kid I used to write there ranting manifestos then head to the backyard to calm down so I might try something like that.

It did help a bit to share stuff here. 🙂

@Appleblossom that's cool that you can identity reasons for your anger. I can relate to write a bit of what you wrote. The 'too much togetherness' experience sounds tough for you to have dealt with.

Thanks again

hello @Zest

Thank you for your honesty. Your words have helped my situation with my son with a diagnosed illness that he is in denial of. I know that I am one of many.

Maternal instincts are healthy and drive mums to help their children in any way that they can. There are many books on parenting but none of them can prepare each individual mum with each individual child. We learn as we go along.

Lovely to read that you are able to love her. A huge relief for yourself as well as your mother.

I hope that you find some comfort on here. Loneliness is something that many on here are learning to experience differently.

Your words will be treasured by many.

Please keep writing

All the best for you and your son @Former-Member

Hi @TheVorticon, it sounds like there are some challenges going on for you right now and you are riding the roller coaster. I hope you know you can talk to us here on the forum and we all genuinely care about what's happening for you right now.

If I'm just back to the usual then there's nothing worth saying and I have no way to say it anyway, and nothing anyone else can say about it either.

Hi @TheVorticon It sounds like you are feeling frustrated because you thought you'd taken a step forward and now you feel like you are right back where you were, is that right? If so, then yeah, that's a yuck space to be in. It's ok to have nothing to say. How about I just sit here with you. I actually really like sitting in silence. I don't have any sense of awkward silences and thus I don't feel the need to fill silence with words. So if you like, I can just sit here and keep you company without saying anything

Hello @TheVorticon and all others

thank you

doesnt matter how many times i hear those words, they still mean so much and that is what I say to myself

stay safe and love yourself