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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

Congrats. @avant-garde ! Between Happy Meals and Plushies, why not?

I know today was a BIG day for you. I'm here if you want a chat about it.

In response to: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde *nods enthusiastically*

Yahuh yahuh!! Do you know what one you wanna get? Or will the plushie choose you?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Thanks @tyme just currently on the emotional rollercoaster after 3 hours going into details

@Jynx plushie chooses me

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde *nods* as it should be!

Much chilling to be had tonight?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx spending some time with a friend, making sure I'm ok mostly, being on my own right now is not a good idea

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Hugs @avant-garde , that's one BIG day you've had. Good on you for being proactive about your safety and not being alone. I hope you have the supports you need at this time.

I'm here if you want a chat, or even to just sit with.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

thanks @tyme, I'm doing a jigsaw puzzle of the Eiffel Tower

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde aww very glad you've got some company with you hun, and yeah good on you for identifying your needs right now!

Puzzle sounds super wholesome and super chill - very needed! 💜

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx I have a stash of jigsaw puzzles for emotional regulation purposes

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

I'm sitting at the dinner table... the kids have put out a Solar system jigsaw @avant-garde

Jigsaws stress me out. I'm glad it is helpful for you.

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