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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

@tyme

Well the pumpkins were gone

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Re: Running

How are you feeling about everything @avant-garde ?

I'm mindful it would've been so stressful and anxiety-provoking as you went today.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@tyme

I'm glad it's over, it was incredibly overwhelming

I can't even think about it right now, just trying to settle my nervous system

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Hey @avant-garde how's things? I am seeing that it's been a bit tough lately. Just reaching out and offering an ear 💜

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

😔

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde 🥺

Hugs, hun (づᴗ _ᴗ)づ♡

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Re: Running

@Jynx

I saw Jasmine* today, had to tell her I won't be there next week

We played a game of go fish that lasted an hour and a half. Yes it was just one game.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Aww cute @avant-garde sounds like a solid game! Was she sad about you missing next week? That's for the surgery yeah?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

Have you ever played go fish? It typically lasts 10 minutes. It was the deck of cards we play with that made it to significantly longer

She isn't the best with knowing her feelings but did come across as disappointed.

And yes for the surgery...

Can we talk about that maybe?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

I have played but not for many years @avant-garde - did you have multiple decks going at once? Sounds super wholesome 😊

Yeah we can, what's on your mind? I can imagine it's bringing up a lot of feelings for you.

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