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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

Thinking of you at this very time @avant-garde

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Re: Running

@tyme

Either my friend lied or some idiot put them back

My phone is on flight mode and all notifications are off

Right now they can go to hell

Maybe then they'll know what it's like to escape satanic fascism

In response to: Running

Re: Running

I wonder why he said to tell no one? I think it's so important to be able to lean on your community, especially at such a vulnerable time. @avant-garde 💛

You absolutely deserve a hug and someone to say they understand.

I can hear this week has been big for you... have you been exploring some poetry? 🥰

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@AuntGlow

That it was his story to share. I'm learning that he's not trauma informed in the very least and doesn't consider how handling a trigger works or what it does to a person.

Poetry happens naturally

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

I'm either very brave or mildly stupid

The rehab centre I went to are coming under scrutiny. There have been news reports and I've contacted the journalist.

After Sunday and the mess that was, I have also contacted another pastor connected to my denomination, who has experience with this and blogs about it, asking for advice and help.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

The Christian rehab place I went to a long time ago got blasted by journos and news reports. It shut them down in the end.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Bow

I think I know the one, I think it helped give courage to those in others.

You kind of understand don't you? I'm not alone... our voices matter...

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@tyme

I think I'm finally getting the Sunday mess sorted out

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@MissGremlin @Jynx

My surgery date has been called

Tuesday 3rd March

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Hey @avant-garde

Sitting with you. How have things been for you since Sunday?

Do you have any mid wk services that you attend?

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