Running

@tyme

Very much not ok now though. It's hard now having purposefully brought to mind the lies I find so hard to shake

Where to from here? @avant-garde I'm curious to know.

I'm here if you want to bounce any thoughts or ideas.

You are very brave.

The jigsaw is a photo of Himeji Castle in Japan

@tyme

@Ru-bee

I pushed myself too far yesterday trying to feel understood here and now dealing with the repercussions, it hurts a lot and saying so at the time didn't help

Hello @avant-garde I was reading through a bit of your talk with Tyme yesterday and can see that you were exploring some really difficult emotions and beliefs. No wonder you're feeling the effects today. What is something that might help you to feel a bit more held today, given that you're having a difficult time? Are there any ways that you can show yourself some extra care?

@Ru-bee

Things just got worse

I'm sorry to hear that things are feeling worse, has something else happened @avant-garde? Do you feel comfortable talking about it here, or do you have any other supports you can lean on at the moment?

@Ru-bee

I sent this to my elder Sunday night

https://saneforums.org/t5/Social-space/Morning-Check-In/m-p/1806757/highlight/true#M506199

This one includes the response

https://saneforums.org/t5/Social-space/Morning-Check-In/m-p/1807237/highlight/true#M506375

That is disappointing to not feel supported after taking the time to explain the situation and your feelings on it to the elder @avant-garde it's understandable to feel to hurt by this

Reading through I did notice you mentioned that this elder is typically good at responding but can take time, I'm wondering if there might be more a response coming or if it seemed that this was all the response he was able to give?

@Ru-bee

It's the word "immediately" that catches me.

It gives the impression that he intends to look into it, but he can't right now.

The leadership don't start meeting again until after the 8th February when our pastor returns from leave.

He likely responded because he wants me to feel seen, heard and acknowledged, like the feedback I have just just this last Sunday.

He said he "appreciates" the information.

That tells me that he's interested. I think he wants to know more about what happened in the Delilah saga and potentially, what could have been done differently.

But one thing I'm good at? Advocating for change, for myself and for others. Evil wins when good people do nothing. I'm not someone who can contently do nothing. I never will be.