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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

Fair enough @avant-garde . I hope things improve for you in the church you are at. I can see it would be hard to have elders come and go.

No Happy Meal? That's okay. Just wait for a Meal Deal next time. We can have it together.

I'm smiling because I can 'see' the happy meal box you drew on 🙂

Hugs @avant-garde

Anyway, I'm wrapping up now. I've got a few admin tasks to finish off. I'll catch you later this week?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@tyme

So Jynx is having the week off, are you allowed to tell me who's taking their place for this week?

But yes I'll be around

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Hey @avant-garde , I actually don't know who is taking their place! Sorry! Or there may not be anyone taking their place. I really don't know. It's not me, that's all I know.

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Re: Running

@tyme

That's funny, I thought you knew everything that went on here. You'll be back Wednesday, I have a dentist appointment Wednesday.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

I was stupid to think anyone would actually have a validating response to me leaving church in tears... stupid I tell you... gah

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Ru-bee?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

hey @avant-garde, Ru-bee's headed off but i'm around 😊 is there something on your mind?

In response to: Re: Running

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@rav3n

Yeah it happened and I kept ahead of the marking

Kids loved the treasure hunt and I had fun just laughing with my best friend and getting blue crayon on my face

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aww yay!! @avant-garde moments of laughter with the bestie are some of best memories, glad you got create some - blue crayons and all!! seems like your hard work was definitely worth it

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Re: Running

@rav3n

Flashbacks suck

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