Running

Oh, thank you for clarifying @avant-garde

I am glad you are feeling good about it in this case!

I hope you're having a lovely evening and finding some time for you.

Here if there's anything else you'd like to talk about. 💛

@Jynx

it started Monday 11th August as two little dots on my stomach... by Wednesday it was a lot larger than two dots and had spread to cover a large area of my lower half... I had been applying the cream that I typically use with these things but I couldn't walk, it was more that I waddled...

I had been getting spasms down my legs for weeks and had no idea what was going on...

I had seen my GP on the Wednesday and he said to just keep going with the cream...

Sunday the 17th I turned up at urgent care and got put on 3 creams and 2 antibiotics... it wasn't the rash I was used to... or expected...

I started the treatment and had an allergic reaction that I called an ambulance...

9 hours I waited in the waiting room, got maybe 4 hours sleep...

I didn't know what was going on but I was alone and scared and exhausted...

Monday morning I finally got seen and they took swaps and they tell me it's cellulitis... I had no idea what that was...

They wanted to admit me but I needed my bed, take care of my cat and feel more settled...

I got put onto the hospital in the home program instead...

They asked me what had changed in the last few weeks, well I moved house, but this place was new, it couldn't be mould... I had started using a new laundry liquid... it had all these natural things... bergamot, mint and myrtle... it started as a skin reaction... so raw from using this liquid for 3 weeks already and wearing it constantly... so I was given this ointment and put on an antibiotic pump with daily nurse visits to change the pump over and help with the ointment with the first review on Thursday 21st August.

Thursday came and I was back for the review and got the pump removed and the midline with some shoulder weakness...

Friday the nurse was early and I started feeling this ear infection (normally have 1-2 a year) that by the afternoon I was back in hospital for it...

They took a swab and gave me drops (ones that I've learned don't work on me) and sent me home.

No surprise that they didn't work.

Nurses still came out everyday to check on the rash and help with the ointment

Monday I was back in for another review, that the rash was clear and I could apply the ointment on my own now that it didn't hurt and ear drops that had proven susceptible according to the swab.

I just wanted to be discharged and to be handed over for my GP to take care of me. He has walked me through so many ear infections that it's ridiculous and so on Wednesday 27th August I got to see him in which he put me on the oral version of the ear drops and said to keep going with the drops for the full 2 weeks.

I see my GP this coming Monday

One good thing did come out though... I got referred to ear nose and throat for an urgent appointment that is next week

I can tell you all this logically but I haven't really talked about the emotional impact of all of this...

TW: sexual and drug references

Then not being able to stick to my schedule...

Being consistently in hospital...

Being alone...

So dreadfully alone...

Oh my stars @avant-garde you poor thing!! Sounds like a really harrowing experience, and one that you had to endure alone 🥺 I can imagine the whole thing would have been non-stop triggers, and like, how do you even begin to explain that kind of impact to people?

I am so sorry that this happened to you, and still not quite over either. I hope your appt at the ENT is a helpful one 🤞

How have you been going since, have you managed to find some time for a lil bit of nurturing and (hopefully) plenty of rest?

@Jynx

My head hasn't quite processed yet... it's still so raw and painful

Makes sense @avant-garde - can take me months to recover from an ordeal that heavy sometimes, especially if it's ongoing, vague/intangible, and I got other life stuff happening around me. Would be nice if it would slow down enough for us all to be able to process our feelings once in a while ay.

Gentle hugs, if you want em 😊

(づᴗ _ᴗ)づ♡

@Jynx

I just need someone to understand, there's so much and I hate everything that happened

100% @avant-garde not feeling understood is soooo isolating. I am sorry that it was such an awful experience, and that it's hard for most folks to realise just exactly how and why it was so gruelling.

@Jynx

Some of the nurses were so insensitive...

And then when it came to the ear wicks, nobody understood Jynx and nobody cared! I had to do it anyway!

It made me realise that there isn't a single piece of my body that hasn't been mistreated or abused and it hurts so so bad

And next week? I get to tell an ENT about everything to do with my ears, all the "home remedies" my dad used and I have no idea what kind of reaction I'll get because "that doesn't happen in western society"

I'm not in the mood for your games right now @ArraDreaming