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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

they do look really tricky, but a part of me really wants to give it a go.

do you have a pic of the metal twist thing? i'm intrigued @avant-garde

also, have you done cryptic crosswords before?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@rav3n

There's a nobly bit on both the gold and the silver.

The nobly bit glides along the grooves of each piece until you figure the way out

I'm not great at cryptic crosswords

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde yep that definitely looks more challenging than i imagined! pretty cool though, do let me know if you ever solve this or the other one.

i just got into cryptic crosswords, they are quite tricky! i'm using an app where you get a new crossword each day, hopefully i'll get tonight's one 🙃

i'm heading off now, take care and hope the rest of your evening goes well 💙

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

my uncle...

He was right next to me...

HE WAS RIGHT NEXT TO ME!

And I didn't hear him

this stupid ear infection

I didn't notice

I didn't see

Until he was right next to me

I can panic now

It was hours ago

But I can panic now

I held it together for hours

I held it together through the doctors

I held it together through chiro

I held it together through shopping

I'm done holding it together now

He was right next to me

And I wish people understood how terrifying that is

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Hi there,

It sounds like a difficult experience. What would be helpful from the community at this time?

@avant-garde

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@holdinghope5

My head is telling me that you're a mod and mods aren't normally on this early.

I come here to feel heard and validated and understood because people on here normally have some idea of what I'm feeling so I feel less alone

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

I understand @avant-garde . That is often the case that moderators are not on 'early', but often they are on the background all day through, and on particular days too. I hope that's okay with you.

Thank you for helping the community understand that you have come here to feel heard and validated so that you feel less alone with what you are going through.

I look forward to reading what the community shares.

Look after yourself there.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@rav3n

Can you help me ground please

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

hey @avant-garde how can i support ya? did you have a grounding activity in mind to work through?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@rav3n

To take something and describe every detail

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