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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

What a beautiful idea @avant-garde I'm glad that your friend is able to do this for you and that you felt able to ask 💜

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

I feel like I have no choice but to hold it all together.

I was at my open house art group today and the news came up

Content/trigger warning
they discussed the story about the paedophile and how he worked in multiple childcare centres...

how it's despicable and wrong and kids should never have to go through that...

Content/trigger warning
It reminded me of when I had to get tested... when I got out and got tested...

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Yep, I hear you @avant-garde . A mother spoke to me yesterday that she needed to get her kids tested.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

I still get nervous tagging you... I'm so scared I'll get in trouble if I tag you twice, even when I'm almost certain you've missed the previous notification...

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde seems I definitely missed a tag here hun, I am sorry!

I can pop in tomorrow and we can chat then if you like 😊 Hope you have a good night! 💜

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

It was over in good morning, but yes I'd like to talk tomorrow

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Afternoon @avant-garde!

How is your Saturday going?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

My lower back hurts but I'm doing ok

How are you?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Ach, lumbar pain sufferers unite @avant-garde that is me as well! You poor dear. Lots of floor-time or tummy-time today mayhap?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

I'll just do some spinal blocking later today

The chiro students were impressed when I made my own blocking wedges, I got a cheap yoga block and cut it in half diagonally, turned out to be the exact correct angle and for only $6

It definitely helps.

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