Running

@Appleblossom gosh no

I'm 35

Haha @avant-garde I had a sense you were younger.

STEM was relatively rare for women back then.

It has been good to see more women in the fields and then as tradies with their work boots.

I couldn’t relate to only discussing clothes, hair, makeup, laundry or cooking. So was always a bit of an outlier.

But I am a girl and do have feelings… lol

@Appleblossom

My dad hated that I was that kind of kid, I was top of my class for English, math and science. I loved learning, I still do.

It's hard to think what I could've been if trauma didn't get in the way...

@tyme ?

Hey @avant-garde ,

I just read your post above. Are you okay?

Are you saying that trauma got in the way of you studying?

@tyme

In relation to the last post, it's just a kind of grief, it didn't get in the way of my studying, it has gotten in the way of everything else, the unseen consequences of trauma, job, family, house, usual stuff.

I'm just finding it a bit hard at the moment...

It's the 10th anniversary of my grandmother's death this Friday and I'm feeling it...

Hey @avant-garde , I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother. I hear you are experiencing much grief. Not only your grandmother, but also Life in itself.

It is not wrong to feel grief. There is no right or wrong way to do it.

What do you usually do to help you through this difficult time?

@tyme

I normally talk about her, she was the most beautiful, loving and amazing woman, she was my everything, she loved me when everyone told her not to bother with me, she was the only one I ever felt cared about me.

We laughed together, prayed together and she would share stories of her life growing up and I would share my poetry and we would just talk and laugh like I had with nobody else and I miss her so fiercely.

She was the only one in my family to love me and show it.

And that's such an important part of grieving @avant-garde . To remember the precious times you had with your grandmother and to know that one day, you will meet her again.

How beautiful that you had someone to love you and pray with you.

@tyme

I only really got to know her in the last 2 years of her life when she was diagnosed with cancer, that I was trapped in another abusive situation and couldn't see her but I would call her every week and we'd talk for hours if my abusers would let me. When I got out I went and visited her and we just talked about books and God used her to strengthen my faith when so much was trying to pull me away.

She defied doctors expectations, she said I was worth fighting for (in terms of life that is)

You are about to sign off I know