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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

avant-gardeSenior Contributor

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

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In response to: Running

RiverSealModerator

Re: Running

At least you can say that you have done all that you can to change things @avant-garde. Sometimes, that's all we can do in situations, and we have to decide how we are to proceed from there and what choices we have. Well done and perhaps sit with it for a while and see what reaction it gets. RiverSeal

In response to: Re: Running

avant-gardeSenior Contributor

Re: Running

@Appleblossom

You're reading through the entire thread aren't you?

In response to: Re: Running

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Running

Yes @avant-garde I was worried when I thought I Chad said the wrong thing on the other thread.

just trying to send support

sadly, in some ways I can relate, but wasn’t sure what to say

I met CASA section of police a few years back.

In response to: Re: Running

avant-gardeSenior Contributor

Re: Running

@Appleblossom

Not just trying, succeeding

In response to: Re: Running

avant-gardeSenior Contributor

Re: Running

@Appleblossom

I'm not sure what thread or post you're referring too

In response to: Re: Running

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Running

The share your PASSION PROJECT thread.

You said “there was a lot of shorthand “.

I guess I am not sure how much to share or what makes sense. Who can see the depth.

was in silent protests for Royal Commission in Institutional Sex Abuse a while back.

my story very different to yours

I have gone back to church but very careful about what I hold sacred. Very wary about abuse of power

@avant-garde

In response to: Re: Running

avant-gardeSenior Contributor

Re: Running

@Appleblossom

Oh hun, I just find it confusing and overwhelming, shorthand being acronyms and abbreviations. You didn't do anything to offend me, I just didn't understand and needed clarification.

It was nothing about what you shared, I just wanted to know what it said, it was like if I were to say (being very outdated here) OMG m8, DYK? LOL!

In response to: Re: Running

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Running

Glad it was fine @avant-garde

I was just being careful and saw you had been very active on this thread.

yes there are lots of ways of miscommunication

STEM Science and tek… but I ain’t good at tek…

hopefully intention matters

it also helps me understand the people I communicate with

Hope you get some shut eye.

Take care

gently bently

apple

ps: I chose “apple” cos as an adult I finally worked through all Christian confusions. Yes it is fine to eat apples.

In response to: Re: Running

avant-gardeSenior Contributor

Re: Running

@Appleblossom

I was a stem kid too, Science Technology Engineering Mathematics

In response to: Re: Running

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Running

So you know what it meant. Are we same generation? @avant-garde

I started uni as mature age in 1983.

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