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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

@ArraDreaming I am? Where did I go? Hehe do you know something I don't?

In response to: Running

Re: Running

Not great timing @ArraDreaming

In response to: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx I feel like if I process the emotions I'm feeling I'll get overwhelmed very quickly

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Huh @Jynx

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Was just being playful @ArraDreaming - tho perhaps we can go be playful elsewhere, as avant-garde is having a time.

@avant-garde distraction is always a viable option until you do feel like it's the right time to 'open the floodgates'? Of emotion I mean

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Whatever you want brother @Jynx

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

What do you mean by "a time", my head hears it as a flippant thing like "she's just in a mood"

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@ArraDreaming cheers man 😉

Oh no no @avant-garde not at all - quite the opposite actually! My friends and I have kinda taken to using it to describe err... the worst possible situations? It's extremely sarcastic coping humour. A hypothetical e.g.

"Oh yeah so that's why we were so toxic for one another - we nearly imploded... it was QUITE A TIME."

The last part is said... almost forced? Like 'haha yeah I'm totally fine with this... 🥲'

It's this vibe:

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

Hence I asked before just running away like my feelings told me to

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde thanks for taking the time to clarify hun, even when your body told you to run. That's tough.

*opens arms, offering hug*

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