I feel nothing

@creative_writer mmm see if I'd noticed something shifted (as a therapist) I would definitely bring it up in the session. That's me though, I like to use the therapeutic process itself as a potential agent of change. Maybe your psych just didn't notice anything. Which is kind of annoying when one has an overtuned emotional system that is snesitive to the tiniest changes within a relationship! 😅 I know as a client, it is harder to bring these kinda things up - and doubly so if the issue itself is 'not feeling safe to bring things up'!! So hopefully you're not beating yourself up or blaming yourself for this particular therapeutic relationship not working out. It takes two to tango, after all!

Very much worth looking into hey! Same goes for support groups, if that's up your alley.

Anyways, I'm off for tonight! I'll be around next week so I'll catch you then darlin. Hope your weekend is nice n chill 😊🫂💜

hey @creative_writer how's your day been? 😊

@Jynx I just don’t think we have been on the same page. It doesn’t make her a bad therapist, but it may not be what I need right now. I’ll be having my first appointment with my allocated counsellor tomorrow with the Guided Service. I thought some support would be good till I figure things out with the psych. I hope you had a lovely weekend 💖

@rav3n I’ve been in pain lately. I hope you are doing okay 💖

@creative_writer yeah for sure, and like I'm not trying to say that she was - just not a good match ay. Exciting about the Guided Service, I hope it provides you with the support you need 😁

Weekend was ok, little stressful bits here n there (tryna deal w a rental increase, nightmare town). How about yours?

@Jynx I reckon I need to work on building personal supports in my life. Chronic loneliness is not talked enough about, but can have detrimental impacts on our lives. Socialising goes against my need to protect myself and I don’t really feel worthy of care and love. There is a lot to unpack.

Cost of living has gone up, it’s stressful. I hope this week is better for you 💖. Weekend was okay, went out for dinner and shopping. I did get a super bad migraine yesterday which I’m still recovering from

sorry to hear 😕 @creative_writer hope your feel better soon 💗

i'm doing alright, bit anxious for the week ahead but going well so far. also hoping your guided service session goes well, sounds exciting!!

@rav3n it is hard being in pain especially when I have things that I need to do. I find it hard to rest too since my brain wants to avoid being caught in rumination.

I hope your week goes smoothly💖. Is there something that’s making you anxious about this week?

Yeah it's so tough having two of our needs in conflict like that @creative_writer - I think it's one of the ways therapy can be helpful by providing us a safe space and a relationship where we can confront these things (i.e. feeling unsafe to get close to someone), and hopefully work through them enough to give us the confidence to then approach them in our lives.

Aww thanks hun. Yeah cost of living (aka corporate greed) has gotten so bonkers hey, as if any of us needed more stress in our lives. I'm sorry to hear the migraines are kicking ya butt again darlin, that's rough. Sending some hugs and hoping for a more breezy day for you tomorrow 🤞💜

@Jynx I was hoping on working through it in therapy. I reckon that’s the next steps, once I am able to form meaningful relationships and feel cared for, it may help with the “I’m too shameful for love” and “nobody is safe” narratives.

I know they blame it on COVID, but I feel like things were still getting more expensive over time even before then. COVID hasn’t helped. The fees for placement were ridiculously high. I took today easy and I’m hoping I’ll be able to get through some uni stuff tomorrow. Classes start this week.

@creative_writer yeah for sure! I think it'll go a long way to be honest. I have heard it said that there is only so much intrapersonal healing we can do as individuals, and we get to a stage where we gotta focus on interpersonal healing through relationships.

Aye I think they basically just used COVID as an excuse to raise prices cos of inflation... But it is very telling that just after a global crisis, big corporations are boasting their biggest ever profits. Makes me pretty angry hey.

Oh neat, you excited about getting stuck back into study?