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The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Hey Forums Friends,

In my recovery, I've often wondered how to better help myself with negative talk. You know? All those voices that tell you that everything will go wrong. All those voices that tell you that you are wrong? Those voices that are the loudest in the evenings?

Well one skill I've learnt and practised and found effective is:

REFRAMING

Reframing is about looking at an issue in a different and more constructive way.

First, we must consider our own perspective. What exactly IS our perspective?

Then, we consider an alternative, more constructive meaning/interpretation.

By doing this, it helps us connect the dots of our story and allows us to look at the issue from a new, more useful perspective.

Example 1: "I never do anything right!"

Reframe: "I feel I never do anything right, but this isn't necessarily true"

Example 2: "All the people hate me."

Reframe: "I think people hate me but it doesn't mean everyone."

Example 3: "My family are so irritating. I can't stand them."

Reframe: "My family is under a lot of stress right now. I know it must be hard for them."

Please add negative thoughts you've come across and the reframe that can be consider. OR, if you are stuck, let the community help you come up with something. Just let us know the thought. No need to name names. You can generalise your comment.

Tagging those who may be interested @Rockdog @Healandlove @Shiki @Shaz51 @EternalFlower @RoseGeranium @Glisten @Birdofparadise8 @Dimity @NatureLover @Clawde @Captain24

Sorry, not sure who else to tag. Please tag anyone who may be interested.

86 replies

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In response to: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

No @Captain24 . Not at all. You are learning to equip yourself with the skills of reframing 🙂

I'm talking about those who look at OTHERS negatively all the time. Like @Shaz51 's in laws who always see the negative side of them and have hence 'ignored' them in a way?

In other words:

Thought: They are such an idiot and never get anything right.

Reframe: They are trying their hardest.

Sorry if I didn't explain myself clearly enough.

So it's more that they have a negative tint on their glasses towards the world. I think it's rarely on themselves.

I remember once I gave an elderly person tea. First it was too hot, then it was too cold, then it didn't come with a biscuit... I'm like "Forget it."

In response to: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

@Captain24

Thought -- I am just a sad person

Reframe -- I may be sad sometimes but I have lots of friends on the forum who likes me and I have 3 wonderful furbabies who love me

In response to: Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Nice @Shaz51 !

In response to: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

I find this interesting to try

In response to: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Hllo Friends Ill try this Concept using what thoughts Ive wrestled with sometimes quite frequently at times 1,Thought, Im not good enough , Reframe Im doing the best I can 2, Thought I must be a dissapointment ,Reframe Its ok to achieve small goals,small steps each day 3, Thought I cant do anything /Im failing to do things on my to do list today ,Reframe Maybe its ok To allow myself to rest as much as possible for timebeing 4, Thought Christmas Shopping is Exhausting ,reframe yes its tireing to do the shopping but the end result is always worthwhile on Christmas day itself ,apologies for my bad spelling tonight

In response to: Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Way to go @LostAngel , well done my friend

In response to: Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

@LostAngel You did so good! I learned from reading your post.

In response to: Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

@Shaz51

Thanks for the tag here. I have read through the thread. This is something I need to remember to work on.

My biggest baddest thought is

I am never good enough

Reframe: I am always trying my best and that is all I can do. I will get there eventually.

My feelings of not being good enough came from my childhood. My Mother always blamed me for things that went wrong in her life.

Meggle

In response to: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

I love this. I have always kept my mouth shut so I don't piss anyone off but as soon as I speak up I'm made to be the bad guy.

How dare I stick up for myself. How do you deal with this? Please help!

In response to: Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Re: The Art of Reframing - Back by popular demand!

Welcome, @Salc ! I think it's often the other person who can't or won't deal with our needs. So when we stick up for ourselves they don't like it and lash out, to keep us down. Does that help?


As for reframing: "I can't manage the house."
Reframe: "I can learn how to manage the house, bit by bit."

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