While in hospital

Hi @BlueBay

thinking of you

Well that puts your need for going to hospital into perspective. I wouldnt have lasted these 15 years .. without a room of my own ..

Maybe when you are settled in your new place there will be other ways for you to hang onto your sanity. Thats right you have to sell. Sorry I forgot, and it is all tied up with the rejection.

Have you been making lists or thinking of what you really want to hang on to .. and what you can ditch?

Dream on it ... try not to worry or loop about it .. but go into the issues of the task .. with @BlueBay's needs for nesting and feeling at home in her own space .. TOP in your mind.

I hate moving ... and can procrastinate like the best .. but when you have really embraced ..??? what things .. will make you feel .. good about you ... centred .. maybe its just the dog kennel .. I dunno .. make it an indulgence ... play with it dream about it.

I ended up taking bits of plants ... it surprised me (Never had been much of a gardener then lol) and deliberately leaving things that had never made me feel good in the first place .. even if they were technically mine .. "a gift".. with too many strings .. or hidden jibes.

Maybe you want to take things that remind you of the Beautiful Blue Bay .. .. but you might find other consolations ..

and then when you do it .. you might feel sifting and deciding is a lot easier.

You might even feel a bit more free.

Hi @BlueBay

It's a hellava rotten situation right now - I think it's really bad that they are closing the hospital - I feel really concerned about you right now

The idea of a room of your own is a good idea - but I don't know how you will get it when all of the rooms in your home a full of people right now.

It was something that came up in my past - and I was able to have a room of my own. And I had a Yale lock on the door - it was my room - and I had it to myself.

Still the subject of women's emancipation was a biggie at the time and the issue of men having their study, their shed, and your husband has his garage - why do men get all the space and women have to share even their bed? It's an interesting question,

You speak often of wanting to run away. Well - why not? I often did during the last years of my so-called marriage. I would go to the university and stay in the halls for a while. Eventually I saved enough money to manage alone and did.

So this is an idea to think about. B#gg#r the financial situation. You are selling the house anyway so why not get a bridging load and take off for a few days alone. It seems to me you might benefit from a holiday on your own. I often do and I always feel better after a few days alone even though I live alone

I think you feel trapped - it seems so - I am so worried about you - and you say you want to run away so often I think people do take off for time alone or in a different place or for whatever reason and it's a perfectly normal thing to do

Or get your sons to share a room for a while and have a room to yourself

Oh dear - you are so boxed in and not at all well - perhaps your GP can get you into a private general hospital for a few days with your cough and your asthma and the change in your medication. You can ask

I don't like advice - but these are suggestions - you can take them or not and it is okay with me - but it sounds desperate for you right now

Lots of virtual hugs - I care a lot

Dec

Yes @BlueBay

I know - your parents owned that house and getting rid of it is a the next thing in a series of events that will improve your life

I have noticed a lot of houses in this area have sold very quickly - this would be a great time to get some quotes from different agents and get your house on the market asap. You can rent for a while - and store a lot of your property until you have your new place to save moving everything twice

I have downsized twice - getting rid of furniture and other things and making space will make a difference anyway - and I think you said your kids are talking about moving out - you can get a place with your own room and insist on it not being TV room etc - but YOUR room - it's wonderful to have your own space - it will make such a difference - no one interupts you - you can be totally yourself in your own room

Do it bit by bit - day dream you way through Christmas - and you can see an agent

The thing about getting your MIL's POAs will be hard for your husband but I think important you have your say too - I could write a lot about this - but not now - think of it though as your going to keep your foot in the door so you have a say in what happens to the old girl - women seem to understand these things better

Horrible though -

You have a lot on your plate - don't think of it in one rolled up bundle of affairs needing attention - you will attend to it all as time passes -

But get all the rest you can

Thinking of you - my wonderful friend

Dec