Miss family

@PeppyPatti

I have an appointment in the morning so I'll go for a walk then

Ok. Well let’s both do this tomorrow morning ?
@Leeanne1 @AlwaysMyself @Cappuccino_75 @Sunflowersage @RadAcceptance20 @tyme

I hope your appointment this morning goes well @Leeanne1 😊, and i hope that if ypu and @PeppyPatti have a walk today that it is enjoyable or pleasant.

@Leeanne1 i am glad you have 4 children who you can still chat with, and at least 2 that you can see/visit 😊. I know it does not take the pain away from missing your other 4 children though. Do you think the 4 children who you do still have contact with would be mentioning positive things/time with you to the other 4 who you don't? I wonder if they could be a "bridge" to help those 4 see the real you (not the things they were told by their father after he got dementia) through your positive relationship with them? 🤔

I can understand grieving the decision to put your child in care. But i can also imagine that having many children would have been very challenging to have time, money, patience, etc and coping with it all.

I assume you were doing what you felt was best for the child and you at the time?

Gee @AlwaysMyself

thanks for writing that to @Leeanne1

It feels like you need to know you did the best you could.
I certainly made many mistakes. I believe the real reason why my two adult sons are both single is that of my parenting and I’ll be surprised it will take my youngest quite a few more years.

@AlwaysMyself @Leeanne1 @Cappuccino_75 @Sunflowersage @RadAcceptance20

That's an interesting thought @PeppyPatti - that your 2 eldest children may be single because of your parenting. Is it OK for me to ask what about your parenting you feel could have contributed to this?

(Did you do such a good job of raising them as confident and independent people that they don't feel the need to have a permanent partner to help them through life? lol, that would be a positive view of it! But from your message I suspect your thinking is not a positive reason?)

Hope you remember you are not alone here @Leeanne1 , whether it is a "better" or "worse" day for you. 😊

@AlwaysMyself I know I'm not alone when

It comes to children but sometimes I feel like that 😞😞

I can understand that @Leeanne1 . I often feel alone even though I know I have a mother who cares for me and some friends (on forum and off forum) who also care. Sometimes what I feel I need is a physical hug and presence of a person.

What would help you most at the moment?

Talking about the feelings, or distraction from the feelings? Or talking about something else that you are also feeling/thinking?

@AlwaysMyself

Hugs are nice. I have friends but I don't always want to be around them when I'm depressed 😞

I am very selective about who I am around when I am depressed @Leeanne1 . Needs to be a "safe" person, someone who doesn't drain my energy, who I can truly "be myself" around and not have to fake-happiness. Preferably a friend who will either chat & listen, or else be able to distract me and make me laugh or smile. I have some friends that I avoid when I am depressed because I find it too draining and I get irritated, or I just feel "different" and "disconnected" from.

Do you know what traits in your friends that you like to be around, or avoid being around, when feeling depressed?

@AlwaysMyself

I like to avoid my boyfriend because he is very negative , because it brings me down