Trying makes it worse

Same re dodgy suburb @maddison most male here seems. Not all .
yeah I dont have to walk thru their 'front yard' tho I guess. I dont like My space being encroached upon

Nah, I wouldn't either @TAB

Hello @maddison @TAB @Appleblossom

I've lived in peaceful and loud suburbs...it is a big shock sometimes seeing ppl late at night, ans feeling unsafe. I am not excellent at living alone @maddison I relate to Ur experience of finding it isolating.

@Appleblossom thank u for the rose, I love it. So pretty and delicate and interesting about the colouring. Sounds disgusting re the comments about ppl on disability, I know what u mean about sometimes feeling like...why do I bother leave my home?

The internet was fixed! It was the nbn cable or something, broken in a million places, it took the man 3 hours to fix and he came back twice.

I was feeling like it wouldn't work in the end, but he knew what he was doing!

I have also lived alone mahben6 years or so on and off, it is sometimes a lot of work, being responsible to keep home and sanity. Some days it all ends up in a pile on the floor.

I am getting better support now with new cm, and the hospital is technically meant to help with stuff like this, home organisation, strategies, keeping order. After a year of fluffing around I now have some help with that, and a good case manager, which feels a little bit like a safety net.

Yay for internet @EternalFlower You can press pause again ⏸️

Home Alone can be hard. I couldn't do the scary tv shows on my own. You are brave to watch them alone. Own home, own bills, own internet technician! can be really empowering.

I need to feel comfortable with person I live with. It sounds like you might have a kind neighbour or two? I never really had that.

It's weird, when I lived by myself, finding the motivation to clean was so much harder. I think I liked a house that felt lived in more. Or maybe I was being more defiant & thinking, for once there is no-one here to tell me to do chores, so I happily lived in mess!!

Having a difficult day here today😔 it's lots of drama.

Did U know it's Diwali? I don't know anything about it. I read that it's one of the biggest religious days in different religions. Buddhist, Muslim India? Sorry, I'm so ignorant about religions. Anyway, Diwali is about good overcoming evil. I like that.

@EternalFlower

Glad you are getting better support.

Yeah my life has been so topsy turvy ... I do not have normal responses in that mostly I lived in poor areas, and get sick of them being called bad areas because I do not see the 2 as equal. By the time I lived in better areas, my mindset was such that I just hated people putting down people in poverty. I would be fine relating on all sorts of things, but the judgy comments would get dropped and put me off the speaker. I even went to a few 'occupy' or homeless sites in last 10 years to touch base with them even though I am older and have secure housing. I have lived in loud places with a big street life as well as quieter places.

I sometimes go where angels dare not tread, but I also do NOT rush in, so hope I am not too foolish. If police are giving homeless people a hard time I have been known to pull my music teacher number on them to get them to ease up and be respectful, or just let them know I as a random community member am watching. I was homeless at 6 and 16, so I guess it runs deep.

Yes there are rotters out there and we have to be careful especially being single women. I walked on a few Reclaim the Night walks. It is important to work on self empowerment, as fear can be the biggest enemy of all.

Hi @Appleblossom @maddison

@TAB

I really respect that sense of care and connection to others as part of a community

We want to protect ppl who can't protect themselves, but even ourselves when we were little. Even us a few years ago. I have experienced being in a scary place and I couldn't speak up. This was only a few months ago.

8t is good that u can use Ur music teacher experience to show who u are and get heard. Whatever we can do to be heard.

@TAB my area is like u described, noisy and city.

I hear fights, drunken shouting, excited ppl going out. I don't relate to any of them, and feel it's probably not the right area for me.

@maddison just checking in with u, how are u? How are undoing with hm and home life?

Hope u are all doing OK

I'm still going to the library even though internet's on. I've discovered a nice spot to sit and get time out from my head.

♥

library sounds good @EternalFlower maybe a fan or earplugs if you hear outside goings when you are at home

Hey @EternalFlower library sounds nice... Perhaps a communal type peace you can't always find at your place.

My area is not centrally located to shops etc. However, we live on the street that leads to metro (walking distance). Fri/sat nights I can hear the bands playing at the pubs. Drunkies! Walking home. Occasional fights... It can be a beautiful area. I can walk to see beautiful beach& sunset. It can be unpredictable too. That's the part that scares me.

I don't think this area suits me either.

I lived in the country for 5 years - Gisborne after finishing high school. Country life is completely different. I think it suited me more. Yet, if I had to choose, I would probably choose suburbia?? Weird, I don't know why.

Thanks for checking in with me EF🌸🧡 I'm really appreciating my online world at the moment.

Things at home are 'sketchy' I wonder if you can read b/W the lines.

I actually don't want to talk about it. It's exhausting. In a sense I guess I've let go a little. It's not up to me where that kite will fly, or maybe it will fall dramatically, spinning to earth.

I had a quick chat with him cm today. She is very young & really nice. It gives me good vibes to know kind, intelligent people are starting their professional life in mental health system. We need lots of them!!

My next art mission is to learn how to draw clouds. I am not too good yet. Its making me look at clouds differently, suddenly.

How are you going @TAB I noticed on the morning thread you were feeling anxiety about op. When is it? And what is it again? (Only if you want to talk about it)

Hello Apple😊

P.S I like the part about sticking up for people & how is like protecting a version of ourselves. 💗🌸