Trying makes it worse

Hi @TAB i watched an old movie yesterday 'LA story".

I also see Viceland has a series on Elisabeth moss...

They are showing all her movies.

She is an actor from the Handmaids Tail, and Madmen.

Hope u get some rest...

I've been told I'm easy and difficult to get along with,

I used to be very shy because of trauma, and at other times I felt too much

Now I feel very different to many ppl because of how my life has unfolded

I live alone and it's very hard for me. But I would struggle to feel safe living with others, too.

Yeah well find joy where you can @EternalFlower like movies. I saw it. Makes me think of that other movie where hes a fake director in a movie oh Bowfinger. Raining now. Im going to bed

@EternalFlower

Good on you for some sorting, and hope your internet gets fixed.

The forest was a beautiful trip. So lush and green, and then the rain, and puddles and kids jumping in them at the market, and lots of beautiful stalls and a long line of musos. We carpooled and chatted there and back.

We were going to have a table of 8 at jazz gala. My son's sleep was all wrong for it, so I understood he could not go. My friend ended up in hospital and she was the healthy one supposed to push her husband in his wheel chair. with Oxygen. It was an older group, and I guess we have to take all that as it comes. I am texting with her.

Hi @Appleblossom it sounds very pure and nourishing, music and stall, and probably the people who came also....

Wow very scary re Ur friend, i hope she recovers and is ok.

I understand with sleep, sometimes it's so important to just rext, so hope ur son had some sleep

I quite enjoyed not having internet over the weekend, I couldn't stream anything, so I watch sbs

It was funny, I kept trying to "pause" it, because it's been so long since I'd seen something on TV which was playing instantaneously and couldn't be paused !

I'm still having a bit of an intense time, many flashbacks and ptsd stuff.

I wrote a list of all the flashbacks, it actually felt good to externalise them.

Have been reading, writing, and soon to cook simple food, which is also calming.

Bought a 5 dollar rose candle at the op shop and hope to burn it tonight for some calm.

Rose is a scent I gravitate to. Do u have any favourites?

Hope ur well xoxo

Yep @TAB couldn't have explained it better myself. I lived in my own for about 10 years before moving in her with my friend. I could go days at a time without talking to a single soul. I'm not sure that smart phones were a thing back then - anyway I wasn't digitally connected, so really had very little interaction with outside world, except for shopping etc I don't think people necessarily need to live together- social interaction is key. Prolonged isolation isn't good imo. Staying connected on here, if nothing else, is at least one way to remember we are part of human network & not alone.

Thankyou for reply @EternalFlower My pleasure 🧡 & thanks for being here for me too! I like that you get me, & appreciate my insights. It's good for me too, to be able to express myself. I think saying that someone is truthful, is about the best thing you can say. Honesty is underrated & almost redundant😮

Thanks🧡🌸

Good luck with internet.

Yeah apparently humans are social not sure whether thst means face to face but still exist on own just not so healthy. @maddison 10 years ago prob just got sort of smart ph but I was slow.
going to supermarket used to be social in a way now its a hassle just trying to get served and avoid homeless people etc more of a pain than 'reward' for going out.

@EternalFlower My Peace rose has a mild scent and beginning to atm. It blooms for a very long time. I sometimes just enjoy the scent of roses as I deadhead them. Sometimes I put petals in a saucer for fragrance. Its range of colouring from yellows through pinks is it best feature.

https://www.gardenia.net/plant/rosa-chicago-peace

Allow them to Gently Flow

We have had sleep issues in the house for a long time. I have had my own version. The social night last night was for pleasure and there would have been no pleasure for him to push through and for me to see him not having a good time, so I went and had good time, and he slept. I hope he will find his good times with me and apart from me.

You were talking about it earlier. I can really relate.

I am a bit triggered atm and took some prn today to calm down. I only take them very rarely. Trying to deal with a social politics thing. A lady who loudmouthed about people on Disability and being very controlling with me, dismissing and patronising me. I told a couple people and stood up to her a little today. We will see how it unfolds. Makes me feel I should not be social. I am too intense or sensitive, but if I stay home all the time I will go troppo, so just have to try and work through it. My son is always home and it is better for him to see me out and about.

No man is an island. I always kinda liked that saying @TAB

Yeh, I live in a very dodgy suburb! At times I am surprised that going out is uneventful.

When the lockdown/pandemic was happening (I'm in Vic) I remember driving through the street downtown. I couldn't understand why so many people were around, sitting on benches etc. Then it occurred to me - these are all the homeless. Disheveled, all male.

I know they can be annoying, or scary - they are just peeps.

How U 2day?