My Mosaic

I feel really let down @Captain24 I was heaps vulnerable yesterday, I was as honest as I could be and trusted my psychologist with some really important information. I trusted that they would care enough to help me stay safe. I was told someone would call me today. And that didn’t happen.

my appointment was Frustrating. I was suppose to have a special ultrasound to help plan for the hysterectomy, but it’s not bulk billed and it’s expensive. So I just had a regular pelvic ultrasound. I asked about booking in for the hysterectomy, and I really did need to have that special super expensive ultrasound- I told him I couldn’t afford it. So my specialist gave me a referral to have pelvic mri in the hospital system. There would be a wait though. He told me to go round to radiology and book it in straight away. I eventually find my way to radiology- start filling in the forms, only to be told that that was also super expensive and not bulk billed. All because I’ve had endometriosis. SIGH. So I’ve just left it.

we also found out today that my brother interstate who has cancer, has been given 18mths - 2yrs to live.
my step dad is dying here, my brother dying interstate. My step dad wants my mum to go see my brother- they need to look and see if respite is an option for my step dad somewhere. Then my mum wants me and my daughter to go see my brother in the next school holidays…. And all I can think about is all the dark thoughts in my head. It is so shit.

it’s been a horrible bloody day. I am exhausted. So emotional. I’ve had it.

Oh @Bow. So much is happening for you.

I get being let down by your team. It took so much for you the be open yesterday and asking for support.

The medical systems is just as bad as the MH system. I had an MRI done not long ago after a mammogram. I know how expensive they are. We have been lucky with all dads scans as they have been bulk billed as a specialist has ordered them.

Im so sorry to hear about your brother. It must be hard on you and your mum. How is your stepdad going?

Sorry to hear @Bow . It's everything all at once! Is there something helpful you feel you can do now to comfort and support yourself?

I really do need that support… especially over the weekend and I’m not sure I’m gonna get it.

yeah, I had an mri a couple of years ago, brain. Was lucky enough that it was ordered by a specialist and it was bulk billed. It’s crazy. All because of wording on a referral form @Captain24

My step dad is so thin and frail. I really don’t go in much, I’ll talk, wave hello from the hall. But I went in a couple of days ago, touched his shoulder. I was shocked. How thin he was. He has been really sick recently, not being able to keep anything down. But they have started a new medication and he is able to eat and little bit now. Still sad.

Just gonna go crawl into bed @tyme

oh…. And at my appointment today when asked to go over to the scales to be weighed, I asked if I could not be weighed. Said I had an ED and found it really triggering to be weighed. She said that was fine. Little win.

I really hope they contact you tomorrow @Bow. So you have something for the weekend.

Wording make so much difference when it shouldn’t. A scan needed is a scan needed. They don’t refer them for nothing.

It sounds like your stepdad is a tough bugger! I’m glad he is able to at least eat a little bit. I hope it makes he feel more comfortable. It’s so hard watching them deteriorate especially when it’s so close. There was absolutely nothing left of my nan. It was so horrible to see.

I will be here over the weekend if that helps.

Im sitting here with you through everything you are going through.

I am sitting with you too @Bow

❤️💙❤️

@Bow Sorry for all your troubles 😢

I’m really hoping you get what you need today @Bow

Thinking of you

Thanks @Captain24 @NatureLover @Eve7

Im exhausted today. And don’t feel the greatest. Just sitting outside in the sunshine at the moment.

hope you all have a good day