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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Oh @Lee82 I'm sorry he's going to be there. I know you shouldn't miss out but would it be better for you to not go?

Sending you a bucket of live and hugs and strength for the decision you make and the day itself. Love and hugs always x

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I wish I could stay home @Anastasia .but it will raise too many questions and plus the boys are so looking forward to seeing their cousins. I can't do that to them

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

You got this Mel, with your phone in your back pocket you have all the support to get through this. Your friends on the fourm arent just on the screen, we are in your heart, we give you strength to get through because you know one of us will be there when you need a little ressurance, when you need a hug from someone who gets you. What flower or animal do you see a lot? For me it's butterflies and when I really am distressed and I see one, I now relate that as a sign that you, or @Emelia8 , or @Zoe7 or @Bunniekins or @Anastasia or @NatureLover or @Eve7 or @outlander or the countless others here that support me are close and it brings just a little bit of comfort, it doesnt always work but when it does it gives me a second to breathe. So pick something you see that makes you take a little sigh and think of us, we are always with you. Love you to the moon and back lovely @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

What a beautiful analogy @Former-Member

Who loves lavender, I smell that if I'm down and out and need a lift x

@Lee82 @Eve7 @Zoe7 @Emelia8 and all...

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Unfortunately @Anastasia , I love lavender but it doesn't love me. If I was to smell it, I would end up in. hospital

You know what I really want to see is a feild of lavender but i guess that would be a very bad idea.

For those who have asked my son is home and we hung out with him last night. Me, Hubby, 2 of his sisters and an ex girlfriend ( she almost lives here, we see more of her now then when they where acutally dating). It was a food fest as he was staving all the time in the hospital and at the end of the night he had snacks to take home. He really is an amazing soul and I got to see that side of him again last night. Hubby asked if he wanted to come for dinner once a week and to my surprise he said yes, I am going to have to try a cook now

@Lee82 @NatureLover @Eve7 @Zoe7 @outlander

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Oh @Former-Member

No lavender for you!

That is so precious about your son and dinner 💞🌷🙏💖

Love it!

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member Beautiful Dizzyizzy xxxx

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member @Anastasia

not coping very well

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I'm sorry hun. You are very brave. I'm in your pocket now together we re strong. I've even turned on my force field so no amount of :pile_of_poo: can harm us @Lee82

👀🙏🌷💞

@Former-Member 💞

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Lee82 @Former-Member @Emelia8

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