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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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@Zoe7

I am so sorry hun

((((((((HUGS))))))))

Are you ok?

In response to: Darkness

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Oh gosh, @Zoe7 ...so sorry for your trauma 😥

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Need some time out @Emelia8 @Anastasia Still very much not coping with the idea he is gone.

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@Emelia8 I am so very sorry to hear about your nephew hun. That is terrible. Very happy he will be ok but sad he has to have surgery. Sending you him and his family strength my love. 🧡

@Anastasia i understand how you have mixed emotions about letting your son go to the car meet babe. You want him to have a little independence and some fun with people his own age but you are understandably worried for his well being. Sending you a comforting hug my beautiful friend 💜

@Zoe7 im glad you had a nice afternoon with your dad hun and sounds like tobes had a great day too. Sending you a little strength for tomorrow and a big hug.💙

@NatureLover yes not too happy about the extension. I am very worried about my brother who has been solely on his own all this time and now has to go another 2 weeks. I am so glad he gets to nominate a person that will be allowed to go over and see him. Sending you much love hun. Hope your week is a good one for you. I believe the weather is going to be pretty good this week. ❤️

@Snowie hope you had a nice day today hun. Love and hugs coming your way. 💙

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Hey babe, bad day here sorry for not being around. Missing you heaps. @Lee82

To everyone who has tagged me today I will attempt to catch up with the all very soon.

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Thank you for pushing the support button beautiful. Hoping you are ok.
love you always ❤️💜💙💚🧡💛

@Former-Member

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We must have been posting at the same time...

I am here if you need to chat beautiful.
sending you a gentle hug and holding your hand.
@Former-Member 💗

In response to: Re: Darkness

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Hug's are very welcomed tonight. Keep switching and lossing time. I think @Emelia8 asked if she has been online at all, I doubt it, as you all would remember her. We call her shadow because that is where she sits waiting to torment us. It's a real struggle to remember that we are not bad while you have these thoughts and images running around my mind constantly at the moment.

How are you holding up my love? @Lee82

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Oh babe. I am so sorry your struggling so much right now. That is just not fair and I can't even imagine how hard it is to have that voice in your head all the time. Just remember hun that you are strong and you can fight this. You are not any of those things. I am happy to keep telling you that for as long as it takes for you to believe it. You are the most beautiful human being I have ever met my love.
@Former-Member

can I ask who I am chatting with tonight? I'm sorry hun I usually can figure it out but I'm not sure if it's Izzy or Nikki tonight.
love you always and forever. ❤️

my boys are home from their dads and I am some what ok my love.

In response to: Re: Darkness

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It's Nikki my dear you can't get rid of me. 😂 I am glad to hear that you are somewhat ok that's a lot better then bad. Love u heaps. @Lee82

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