Hi @Former-Member @Lee82 ... I see that you were up half the night and all early morning again. 😔🌺
@Lee82 ... you asked me about my experience with EMDR, so I am just getting back to you on that.
I will start by saying that I found it to be a positive experience overall. Although I think when in the midst of it, I would not have said that. I will also add that I had done Exposure Therapy only a year or so prior to doing an extended block of EMDR therapy. So you could say that some of the ice had been broken already, making it a little easier than it would have been otherwise.
I will state that I think it's very important that your therapist is fully trained and knows what they are doing. Ask to see their qualifications and ask about their experience. For me, I also think it made a huge difference that I had been seeing my clinical psychologist for some 4-5 years before undergoing the therapy. During that time we had developed a good understanding and trust with each other. She knew my story and what my reactions were likely to be, as well as how to deal with them when they did occur.
They will not (or should not) commence EMDR until they are confident that you are able to cope with it. They will ensure you know how to breathe properly and deal with panic attacks when they occur. They will talk to you about having a 'safe place' to go to if things become too overwhelming. They will keep emphasising this to you, because its very important you feel safe.
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy is an interactive psychotherapy technique used to relieve psychological stress. It is proven to be an effective treatment for trauma and PTSD. People who are dealing with traumatic memories and those who have PTSD are thought to benefit the most from EMDR therapy, although it is being used for other MH issues as well, including depression, addictions, EDs, anxiety, etc.
It can be particularly effective for those of us who struggle to talk about their past experiences. This was a big thing for me, because I tend to just clam up and shut down when asked to talk about my trauma. EMDR does not require you to talk much, if at all, about your trauma. In fact your therapist does not even need to know specifically what your trauma is. Although I think it would help them to know, in order to help you through any difficulties as they arise.
It may all seem a little bit "smoke and mirrors", but what happens is that you are encouraged to relive traumatic or triggering experiences in very brief doses while the therapist directs your eye movements. My therapist used a finger to wave back and forwards in front of my eyes. You just need to keep your head still while your eyes follow the target. Some technician tap your knees one side then the other, while others use a button to shift your eye focus from one side to the other. As I said, my therapist mostly used her fingers, but there were times she felt she had 'lost me' and she would then tap my leg instead. Sometimes you may find yourself locked into your bad memories and feel you cannot escape it. Thats when your therapist needs to be very experienced to help you come back to the present.
The theory is that EMDR is effective because recalling distressing events is often less emotionally upsetting when your attention is diverted. It allows you to be exposed to specific memories or thoughts without having an unbearably strong psychological response. Over time, this technique is believed to lessen the emotional impact that distressing memories or thoughts have on you.
Your therapist will ask you to think about one specific distressing event in your life. They like to start with something which is less traumatic to you. So they start easy and deal with that memory before moving onto the harder stuff, once they are confident you can handle the transition to more difficult memories. So you bring a specific event to mind and think about it. The therapist will wave their finger in front of your eyes and you continue to think about your traumatic event. This will happen for some time, and sessions will likely last for an hour or more. They will frequently ask you how you are feeling and what level your distress is at. As you continue to work through each memory with your therapist, the level of distress should gradually reduce. Like it may start as a 10/10, but reduce to a 6/10 by sessions end. As I said, make sure you have a fully qualified and experienced EMDR therapist, because things can go wrong. And they need to know how to bring you safely back to the present if they need to.
In short, and put simply ...EMDR aims to reduce the emotional response to a specific bad memory. Each memory is dealt with separately. It is safe when administered by a qualified and competent technician, and even more so when in a hospital environment as you will be Lee. It is a treatment which is proven to work for most people. I don't think any therapy will ever take away all of our distress @Lee82 , but it definitely takes the edge off. And that in itself can make your life livable once again.
I see you fear that it may make you worse, rather than better. I understand your fear around that. But I think you have to ask yourself "Can it really be much worse than it is right now?" If things get much worse than they are now for you @Lee82 ... my fear is that we won't have you. Yes it's very likely that during therapy and in the immediate aftermath of each session, you may feel absolutely dreadful ... very much heightened emotions and reactions, both physical and emotional. But the great thing for you, is that you will be in hospital and safe. Over time, with continued therapy, you will start to feel much better.
I'm sorry ... my post seems a bit all over the place. I just said things as I thought of them, hence it ended up a little scatterbrained. I hope it all makes sense and gives you a bit more of an idea of what to expect. Different therapists use slightly differing techniques, but the principal is the same. And remember, you have both @Former-Member and myself here (who have both been through EMDR) to help support you throughout this scary journey you're about to undertake. And you know you have the support of a great number of other members here, including @NatureLover @Eve7 @Anastasia and many others. I am feeling very positive for you @Lee82 .
I'm so pleased to hear @Former-Member that you got 10 years peace from your EMDR therapy. Its a shame it was not administered and completed as well as it should have been. Although I have been told that patients often need a top-up dose of therapy over time. So perhaps the 10 years is a good result anyway, regardless of any shortcomings of the actual treatment. I dont thing there were too many practicing EMDR therapists around 10 years or more ago, so you did well to find one at all.
Okay I will leave you with it. I hope you both ended up getting some reasonable sleep eventually. @Former-Member @Lee82 . Happy to talk any time. And if you have any other questions Lee, please ask. I am happy to answer as best I can, based on my own personal experience.
Emelia 🌸
