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Something’s not right

Darkness

Unknown userMember23 Apr 2020, 7:03 pm AEST

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

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In response to: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 6:51 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Oh honey I am so sorry to hear that. Are you still having sessions with Nat? Probably not the best idea to internalise things babe. You need to let it out otherwise it will eat you alive. Is it something you can talk about here? If not can you speak with Nat about it?
I am hoping you are feeling a little better now babe.

@Former-Member

In response to: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 6:53 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

@outlander How have you been hun? I'm so sorry I haven't visited your thread in a while. I have just been struggling quite a lot.
how is your new diet going?

In response to: Re: Darkness

outlanderSenior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 7:09 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

its more then ok @Lee82 i havent really been around as much atm just kinda floating between just a few threads too.
the new diet is hard. i havent seena dietician yet but im not sure when ill do that just yet. theres hidden lactose/dairy in sooo many things so ive just been working on eliminating that rather then trying to amke everything low sugar as well but carbs are almost non existent (well the obvious sort anyway).

i know youve been struggling quite alot too. i really hope that things will settle soon.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember17 Aug 2020, 7:11 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Hey babe, yeah I actually have an appointment with Nat tomorrow. It was just a hard day missing Kylie. I am fairly well medicated now so am very calm. How did your day pan out sweetie. @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 7:18 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Yea I can imagine it would be difficult to navigate around everything not knowing if you can eat it or not. I know its only been a short time but are you feeling any different?

we are lucky we have access to the internet these days and I I'm sure you can find everything you need to know through that until you can go see a dietitian.
@outlander

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 7:22 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Oh thats really good to know hun. I truly hope speaking to Nat tomorrow will help you feel a little better.
speaking with Zoe about her loss has probably brought up your own emotions and thoughts of Kylie. I can't even imagine what you are feeling hun and I am so sorry. I am sending you a gentle hug 💗

love you to the moon and back 🌙🌏

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

outlanderSenior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 7:23 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

a little @Lee82 i still feel yuck but the huge flare ups seem to have eased a little unless i have anything with dairy in it (or too much even with lactose free thigns) then i know about it!

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 7:28 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Thats really good to hear hun. A little relief is something. @outlander

How are the horses doing?

In response to: Re: Darkness

outlanderSenior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 7:34 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

the horses are good. 2 horses went home to their owners so im 2 horses down to care for now @Lee82 they were twice a day care basically since december last yr so its abit of relief and also good news their owner can finally have them back after all the bushfires destroyed thier homes

In response to: Darkness

Emelia8Senior Contributor17 Aug 2020, 7:39 pm AEST

Re: Darkness

Dear @Former-Member ... I love the picture of your Christmas gnomes from a couple of days ago. So cute. Have you painted them yet?

And your little Princess looked particularly adorable after her grooming. I do hope she kept the pretty pink bow in for a while at least.

Really wanted to thank you @Former-Member for thinking of me, tagging me and posting some special messages to me while I was off line. Your kind thoughts helped to sustain me and keep me safe. I thank you so very much for your kindness and compassion.

Thank you to you too @Lee82 ... your message came at a time I was particularly vulnerable.

Thank you both so much. 😇💖

Hello also to @NatureLover @Bunniekins @outlander and others.

Emelia 🌸🐶

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Aboriginal flag

Torres Strait Islander flag

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.