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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I understand that babe because I worry about you a lot too.
Thank you so much for being there for me last night babe although I wish it was in the flesh.
I really hope you were able to get at least a little rest last night babe. How are you feeling today?
@Former-Member

I love you always and forever, to infinity and beyond. ❣️🌻❣️

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Yes honey I got some sleep and I am ok this morning. @Lee82 I love you and cherish our friendship and I want that to continue for a long long time. But for that to happen I need you to be careful, be gentle, be safe and reach out whenever you need.

I love you 3000 always

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Honey that makes me so happy to hear you are doing ok today and you got some sleep. I am smiling right now.
I am working at being gentle honey but I can say that I am safe.
love you to infinity and beyond

💜 @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thank you. Exh2 is getting me out of the house today so I will be gone for a little. Hope you are around when I check in later. @Lee82 💖

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

That is fantastic gorgeous. Have a really nice time. I will definitely be here when you get back.
❤️ @Former-Member ❤️

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Lee82 , honestly babe how are you feeling this afternoon 💖🦋

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Hey honey how was your outing? How you feeling?

honestly, I feel sh**. I am mentally and physically exhausted. I can't really describe it but it feels like i am numb like my body has gone into shut down mode trying to protect me I guess.
@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I hope you are being mentally kind to yourself and being mindful of your self talk. It was a "big" one last night so no wonder you are completely exhausted. Please be gentle with your mind and body.

It was nice to get out of the house, we went to get his mother's Mother's Day and birthday presents. I actually remembered the technique @Sans911 was trying time use to help you last night, when something triggered my flashbacks and while I don't think I did it completely right it worked well and fast. By the time Sean noticed something was wrong (he was paying for food) I was already calming down. I have lost time a couple of times again today but they have been for longer than normal but as always Sean is close so no harm done.

@Lee82 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member

I'm so sorry you have experienced time lost again babe. That would be very unsettling. Glad that Sean was with you. I'm so glad you were able to use @Sans911 techniques. That is so good honey. Don't think there is a right or wrong way to do it. It worked and that's all that matters.
Can I ask is this Kymberly I am talking to? I hope that doesn't offend you it's just the only person I have heard use exh2 name is Kymberly

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

And that is why I love you so much... you noticed, you remembered. Yes it's Kimberly

you never answered my question about be kind to yourself my love @Lee82

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