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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Thank you for being here @Zoe7 . I appreciate your support. Hope you are able to get some rest.
sweet dreams my friend. 🦋💗

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Hi @Lee82 I am here for a little while if you need to chat or just want someone to be around.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Hi @Eve7 nice to meet you. I'm not sure if we have spoken before. How is your night going?

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

My night has improved. I was hiding in my room most of the weekend but I've had some lovely chats tonight . It's great to have support here isn't it?

i sometimes wonder if I'll ever get "better" but I do think I'm improving ever so slowly.

are your boys asleep?. Do you have night meds?

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I'm so sorry you have had such a rough weekend. My weekend wasn't any better. I had to stay at mums for the weekend as my kids were with their dad and I am no longer allowed to be left alone. Yes my 2 boys are asleep. Yes I do have night meds but I don't feel like they are working tonight. 😔

It is nice to hear that you feel you a getting better even if it is ever so slowly.
@Eve7

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

I'm sorry about your rough weekend and I hope you are ok staying with your mum. My mother doesn't even know I've been unwell let alone in hospital. Sorry about the night meds not working as that makes it hard.

Do you have plans for tomorrow?

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

You in hospital right now @Eve7 ?
how is it going? My mental health team are trying to convince me to go to hospital too. It's just so hard when I have two young boys to look after. I have been there twice before I just can't put them through that again.
No plans for tomorrow except an appointment with my psychologist.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Hospital is ok. It’s private and I have been treated well. I’ve had ECT but that has finished now.

I’m glad to have been here as I’ve stayed safe and it’s better to be here with med changes. Some of the meds made me really sick and nauseated so the care has been good.

its been over 20 years since I’ve been in hospital but my kids look just as hurt and confused as they did when they were little so I understand your concerns for your boys however, don’t you think treatment in a safe place would help you all in the long run? It’s a hard decision but I really had no choice at the time.

Youve been unwell for a while now and I’m sure you must be exhausted. If you have someone to mind your boys it might be a good choice but only you can decide that.

💙🧡💙

In response to: Darkness

Re: Darkness

@Former-Member Hey Nikki I hope you had a decent sleep and have a kind and caring day. Love peaxxx

In response to: Re: Darkness

Re: Darkness

Good morning @Lee82 ...have been catching up and reading about your distress overnight...am so very sorry you're suffering like that 😞

And you too, @Former-Member . I worry about you both lots.

I really hope today is kinder for both of you.

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