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Something’s not right

Darkness

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

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Re: Darkness

I'm so sorry I haven't been on much today. It has not been a good day for me. Just popping in quickly to let you know I am thinking of you and I hope you are ok. If you can I would love it if you could check in tonight. Even a support just so I know you are ok. Thanks babe.

love you always and forever.
@Former-Member

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@NatureLover Hey my friend. I'm so sorry I haven't been on much it been a pretty rough day. Yes quarantine means I can't see my brother 😔

hopefully I get the results soon but may take up to 5 working days. I hope your night is going ok hun.

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💗 @Former-Member 💗

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@Lee82

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@Lee82 wrote:

@NatureLover Hey my friend. I'm so sorry I haven't been on much it been a pretty rough day. Yes quarantine means I can't see my brother 😔

hopefully I get the results soon but may take up to 5 working days. I hope your night is going ok hun.


@Lee82 am sorry your day turned rough. 😞 5 working days seems a long time without the support of your brother... I really hope today is a bit better for you ❤

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Thinking of you today @Former-Member

I hope something special happens to bring some joy to you.

🐶🌻🌺☀️🎹🏝

💙🧡💙

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💖🌸 @Lee82 🌸💖

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Babe are you awake by any chance? @Lee82

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Morning everyone, I have been in what a lot would call crisis the past couple. of days and that is why I have been away from here. I didn't trust myself not to post something that would be against the guidelines. I know a few of you have tagged me over the last couple of days and I will try and get to you as soon as I can. I want to thank those who have for your continued suppport. Please know though I wasn't here you all crossed my mind a lot in those 2 days.

I haven't been able to go as long as 10 minutes without something trigging me into a panic attact and while there where a couple of times I was able to calm down with tecniques that we have learnt from our time here unforunitly more times than not it was a full blown meltdown.

I know a few of you don't visit this thread and thats ok, i just don't have it in me to shoot over to where you are right now.I have horse therapy today so even if i was up to chatting i am not going to have reception most of the day.

Hoping our fourum family are all as well as they can be and wishing you all a peaceful day

@Eve7 @NatureLover @Zoe7 @Appleblossom @outlander @Former-Member @Sans911 @frog @MDT @Snowie @Shaz51 @Lee71 @Angels333 @Faith-and-Hope @mudsum @SpiderLady @Fluttershy1 @Lee82

Morning my beautiful friend, I am sorry I have been here less and less to support you. Have you got the results from your covid test yet? How are your gorgeous little men going? More importantly how are you? I will confess to being worried about you as you too have not been here much. I try to follow you through my emails when I can't acutally be here. So if you could check in that would relieve a little stress and pain from our heart. Really hoping you are ok my goregous bff. Missing you heaps and loving you always Mel. @Lee82

PS everyone please forgive my bad spelling, my head is just not functioning right

In response to: Re: Darkness

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@Former-Member - I'm struggling, I'm awake at this unearthly hour crying with my alters switching.... mind is racing. I feel numb.

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