FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Something’s not right

Darkness

Unknown userMember

Darkness

Well it's been a hellish few weeks, I have fallen into the rabbit hole and there seems no escape this time. The darkness has come and it thicker than the fires of hell.

Things just don't seem to going right at all and my MH is just getting worse and worse. Not sleeping (afraid to sleep) not eating and not taking my meds. I know this doesn't help but why bother because when I am on them I either feel zone out or that they do nothing anyways. I didn't make it work today, got to the front and was physically sick and froze again. Crawled back into bed where I stayed untill I had an unexpected call.

My 3 main MH professional and I in a conference call, at the end of the call I was given a choice be sectioned or have my ex move back in temporarily to provide around the clock monitoring, this means for at least two weeks of him being here making sure I eat, take my meds and be present for all appointments and no SH. I am not happy about either option but because of teenager trauma in a MH hospital I am taking the ex.

I will not be as active as normal but I will check in. but like tonight, I may just support posts as I am struggling to even type this. So @Snowie @eth @Lee82 @Eden1919 @Purplerain @Lotusgirl amd anyone I missed I will be getting the care I need and will be safe. To some of the newest forum members please forgive me if it takes a bit for me to get back to you.

6906 replies

1,791 - 1,800 of 6,906
1...179180181...691

In response to: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: Darkness

Thanks @outlander that makes me feel a little better knowing that I am not the only one that goes through these things and feel this way even though I really do wish you hadn't experienced any of this. Sometimes I feel like I am crazy cause of the way I feel. This life is very scary. The unknown is hard to cope with. Not knowing if or when things will get better. Not knowing how much longer I will be able to hold on for. Not knowing when that day will come when I have had enough and i say no more fighting.

In response to: Re: Darkness

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: Darkness

I wouldn't wish mental illness on anyone @Lee82 but the good thing is so many of us here get it and understand how we are feeling even when we are in the darkest of days.
your not crazy or going crazy but I do get how that feels too. the unknown and the future can look really scary when we can barely see in front of our noses.
my hopes is that one day, sooner rather then later, things might start to get abit easier or the light in that dark tunnel might start to appear.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember

Re: Darkness

My beautiful friend, I hope you had an ok night with your brother and you kept the monster away. I can not add anymore words to what @outlander has already said to you. Please know you are worth it, the support and love you receive from your friends here, the support your family are trying to give you right all of it. YOU ARE VAULED, YOU ARE WORTHY, YOU ARE LOVED

I really hope that everyday you find the strength you need to just get through that day and then the next one and the next one. The world would be a sadder place without out you and I know many here would agree with me and your gorgeous boys wouldn't definitely agree with me.

I pray that you are sleeping right now and getting some much needed rest. I hope today you will find some peace even if it's just for a minute. You are always telling us to be kind to ourselves and I wish you would to especially with your thoughts. There will never be the right words to express how we feel about you and your friendship and we would hurt so bad if you were no longer here. I know you can do this, it's a tough fight my friend but it's one you can win and have been winning every time you wake up and face the new day.

I won't be areound much today as I have a paint pouring date with my neighbour, but as always your will be in our thoughts a lot and you are always in our heart my love.

I love you 3000, to infinity and beyond Always @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember

Re: Darkness

Helo my Lee I missedd you. Seannie got us new tys yesday shep phil and tedy I'm liv yo

Kimmy

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: Darkness

Hey beautiful thank you so much for those kind words. I am so lucky and grateful to have you in my corner. Waking up every morning and trying to make it to the end of the day as best I can is all I am capable of doing right now and even that is getting harder to do.
I just don't know what to do anymore. I am a lost soul who is broken and flawed. I don't know why anyone bothers with me. I truly don't

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: Darkness

Hey @outlander how come you are up so early?
my apologise for not replying last night to your last post I fell asleep. My SP kicks in pretty quickly these days but don't keep my asleep for too long.
how you feeling this morning?

In response to: Re: Darkness

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: Darkness

Ive only had around an hour of broken sleep @Lee82 might get in another hour maybe.
Im usually up early but dont normally come online till its a decent hour..

And thats ok at least your getting a few hours sleep

In response to: Re: Darkness

Unknown userMember

Re: Darkness

I bother with you because I love you and you deserve it. @Lee82

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: Darkness

I'm so sorry that you struggle so much to get some decent sleep @outlander . Is it still the pain in you stomach that keeps you awake? I'm not sure if you have told me this before but do you take SP? Of course you don't have to answer that if you don't want to.

In response to: Re: Darkness

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: Darkness

You are just too kind to me @Former-Member

I don't deserve it.
I hope you enjoy your paint pouring with your neighbour today gorgeous.
I love you to infinity and beyond babe.
❤️

1,791 - 1,800 of 6,906
1...179180181...691

SANE Forums is published by SANE with funding from the Australian Government Department of Health.

SANE Forums does not provide crisis support.
If you need immediate assistance, please see available crisis services.

Learn more about SANE and SANE services at sane.org

Back to top
SANE logo
Australian Commission on Safety and Quality in Health Care NSQDMH Accreditation logo

Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.

Donate Now
Aboriginal flag
Torres Strait Islander flag
LGBT flag
Transgender flag

SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.

Back to top
SANE logo
Australian Commission on Safety and Quality in Health Care NSQDMH Accreditation logo

Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.

Donate Now
Aboriginal flag
Torres Strait Islander flag
LGBT flag
Transgender flag

SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.

SANE is a public company limited by guarantee and registered tax-exempt charity with DGR (Deductible Gift Recipient) status.

Charity ABN 92 006 533 606. Donations of $2 or more are tax deductible. SANE, PO Box 1226, Carlton VIC 3053.