Numb again

Ceiling done @Pollyotter

I'll have a little break now then do the last coat on the walls. Then I'll do another coat on the ceiling later this afternoon. I'll clean up tonight and try to begin painting the trims also - see how tired I am and if my arms still work lol

I have one week left before I head back to work. I have a little work I need to do which will probably take 2 or 3 days - but that will be pacing myself. I also need to weed the garden and mow the grass - that is rain dependant though as we are expecting rain for most of the week.

I will have the last few days of the holidays to rest and not do much at all.

No rain this morning but it did rain overnight a little @Pollyotter We are expecting rain for most of this week though.

haha - huge arms - they might drop off first lol I used to have very strong arms as I played softball ...I was also super fit but being so sick for so long I lost all fitness and muscle tone. There is not much I can do about it as I still struggle to do a lot of things. This paint job has been a process because of that too but I am getting there and there is no use stressing sbout how long it is taking.

I need to think about getting lunch soon - need the energy to keep going.

What have you been up to today?

I hope it helps with the flashbacks too Hon - anything that can help is a good thing @Pollyotter

I have needed to finish plastering the cracks for a few years - I started before I got sick - that is when I got the fireplace done. So although I have only been plastering and painting the loungeroom this week the whole project started about 4 years ago. It is nice now not to have exposed parts of the wall, all cracks filled and all walls the same colour 👍

I will probably ever get back to the level of fitness I once had but I do need to begin to work on that again - no real motivation to do so though. I hate walking (bores me) but I do enjoy taking Toby to the beach. The only downside is it is about 20 -25 minutes away and I haven't been able to afford the extra petrol. I am slowly getting on top of my finances now I am back at work fulltime but along with that also comes less time to go anywhere ..and of course the present isolation restricts that. I will get back there eventually 👍

awww thanks Hon It has been a very long road @Pollyotter but I could not have got this far without the forum or the team I have around me - so that I am extremely grateful for. ...and of course my fur babies have helped me survive so many times 😺🐶

I am okay with a ball in my hands - and would love to get back to playing tennis but at present even walking up stairs is a struggle so I need to work on even a basic level of fitness to just get through the day. I am exhausted by the end of the work day usually - especially if I have been standing up all day. I tend to sit down when I am working with the kids but spend most of the rest of the time on my feet - it doesn't help my back either.

I have had lunch but now feel tired again so might have another nap. It is really grey and overcast here again so snuggling with Toby for a little while will be nice.

I'll catch up with you later

Your room sounds amazing @Pollyotter Having that safe space we can go to is so important and it seems like you have made it a really great space for yourself. If you get a bar fridge and a disco ball you may never leave LOL I would be quite happy in that space too

As for your first point - it has been my pleasure being here with you. I am much further along that acceptance path and although I still have bad days (and really bad days) on the whole I am in a much better place. There are still inevitably triggers, flashbacks and nightmares - I don't think they will ever leave me but I also have better ways of dealing with them now - and they don't set me back for days/weeks like they used to. Being able to share experiences here is what we are part of Hon and if it has helped even in a small way then that is fantastic.

I am so glad the church thingeys helped - when we find those calming things - whatever they are - that is another thing we can add to our basket of coping strategies.

I have given up on the painting tonight - I could not be bothered getting the spotlight out of the garage and without it I can't see the walls properly - need natural light again tomorrow. The first couple of coats were easy because I could see where I had been because of the darker original colour underneath but now doing the final coat it is the same colour. I also have a pretty massive headache so happy to have some meds and spend the night on the couch with Toby. I have began to clean up - vacuumed at least and got up all the plaster dust. I need to wash the floors but no use doing that until after I have finished painting.

I hope with your new space you can sleep better tonight Hon - do you start super early tomorrow again?