I need some reassurance

Hi @Eden1919 just want to reassure you that you don't have to be 'fine' here. If you want to talk about what's going on at the moment feel free to tag me.

Hi @Eden1919

I'm sorry you feel as if people are ignoring you or are sick of you

I have just been busy lately and never really finish all the notifications I receive - so I am sorry I didn't see your post

I'll catch up soon

Dec

Hi @Eden1919

I could relate to you being tired of yourself as I feel that way about myself a lot. We all do have some inner life and there are many beliefs about what that means and how to live with it or manage it.

I also get the sense that you are putting a lot of energy into pleasing others, irl, here, and in your psyche. That is surely very draining. Family often want to only hear the happy things as they are worried about past or present things. We do all effect those closest to us. I still struggle with my people pleasing. It took a long time to recognise the problems with it and try and centre myself and please myself ... totally weird for me ... I was allergic to the word "like" for a long time. I could triggered by any old like button.

I have noticed that you are giving and helpful to others on the forum. It is really hard to know what to post to people than can really help, but you try, and I try. I know I sometimes miss the mark, but have good intentions ... for what that is worth .. idk ??

Everyone is a lot of people. A good thing about a forum like this is that it attracts people from a wide range of walks in life and experiences, and in posting, we are open to those responses. I have struggled with some responses, but learning to work with them in a way that is productive for myself. Phew ... that is not always easy.

I have a very different way of thinking about my inner life than you.

I have seen sorry situations with people diagnosed with Sz in my family. It probably made me more hard headed in a reaction, always trying to touch base with science in an attempt to connect with "reality". Not because they were simply to be written off as delusional, more they were misunderstood... and I was too younbg and did not have enough information to put their stories together ...somehow the channels of communications would get blocked and the blockages accumulate ... Dont know if I am making sense ... but just responding ....

I like you around the forum because I think you are brave about how you express yourself. The pressure to "be alright" is huge in a messed up crazy world.

@Owlunar @eth @Appleblossom Thank you, I am sorry I haven’t replied I am having a really hard time and something happened recently that has really shaken me up. I am struggling to keep in one place and I am trying to keep distracted but I feel very unreal again and keep having intense thoughts and the things that are with me all the time are getting hard to ignore and I am really scared all the time and just feeling not right. I can’t really explain it very well right now.

Hey @Eden1919,

I'm sorry that you've had something happen that's caused you to be having a pretty hard time right now. It sounds really scary having intense thoughts that are getting hard to ignore. I can hear you have been working hard on your distractions but are finding it really tough. I've sent an email to check in with you.

Take care,

Tortoiseshell

Hi @Eden1919

You have expressed yourself well enough - you have had some kind of event in your life that is making it very difficult to maintain your normally "safe" exterior and this is wearing you down

Not only that your studies have ended and as good as that might be things have changed and there is a large space in your life

I know you fell as if we sick of you - okay - that's how you feel but it's not the case - we are all different with various backgrounds - some people are on-line all the time and then there are others who come in less

I like reading your posts - I had a long spell that caused me stress - I'm still getting over it

And we are all in good good company

Dec

@Owlunar I didn’t mean to make it seem like I thought you didn’t care it wasn’t anything anyone on here did I was just having some really intense thoughts/beliefs at that time and i thought all this stuff that was kind of hard to explain but anyway I didn’t mean to make it sound like it was anyone’s fault.

Hey @Owlunar and @Eden1919,

I hope you're both travelling okay. Misunderstandings are really common in life and then even more so in online or written communication! Often we think we know exactly what someone means and then they surprise us. Take care of yourselves and check in with us at team@saneforums.org if you need.

Tortoiseshell

@Eden1919

I have had some up & down times recently.

SOmetimes distraction is helpful, but sometimes if the distracting takes more effort, and life is presenting issues that need to be faced or solved. Distracting does not work then. It is important to face one's fears. I can hear you have a lot of fears, so some help facing them. we also change over time and have different beliefs and priorities.

Take Care

Sending you strength and clarity @Eden1919 It does sound like things are a bit rough for you lately. When things get like that for me I see my psychologist or sometimes my GP if I can't get in to the psychologist. Reaching out here is good and brave and you clearly have support here and you're valued as a forum member. However, sometimes we need to reach out offline too. Do you have those kind of supports you can talk to?