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Sleeping too much
8691 replies
In response to: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
I think you are right with the regrets @Former-Member. Without them we don't move forward. My head is in a strange place this weekend and I'm not really sure why but like you I'm learning it will pass. Just be patient and ride the waves I guess. I like your self pamper days, one physical and one spiritual. I'm going to post a couple more and then take some time off the forum again. I think it helps me to do this in spurts. Have a lovely spiritual day 💜🤗
Hey @Decadian Im so sorry you are in the wars with your physical health again. It is a tricky time of year with pollens and winds to cause infections and sinus problems. Just wanted to say hi and wish you a speedy recovery. Best wishes 💜🤗
In response to: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
Hi @Decadian, feel for you, crook sinuses and all. Let the breeze blow through the house if you can and the sunshine touch your toes. We'll be kind to ourself for each other today.
You know, this self compassion thing hit home again when I saw a post that bought home how the way we treat ourself affects others - because, WE ARE ALL CONNECTED. A practical example of this is physical health, not taking care of our bodies impacts the health care system and our capacity to work or contribute to our family and community. This applies to the heart as well. Taking big holidays away is how sensible F/T workers dealt with this one. I use to get so jealous when people went away but now I know - they really needed that to cope. If we can't 'get away' we have to be more creative finding little breaks here and there. But especially in our self talk. I have a rocking chair that helps me feel hugged by a loving God, and rocked to sleep now and then for little power naps.
Be gentle with you today Decadian..
You know, this self compassion thing hit home again when I saw a post that bought home how the way we treat ourself affects others - because, WE ARE ALL CONNECTED. A practical example of this is physical health, not taking care of our bodies impacts the health care system and our capacity to work or contribute to our family and community. This applies to the heart as well. Taking big holidays away is how sensible F/T workers dealt with this one. I use to get so jealous when people went away but now I know - they really needed that to cope. If we can't 'get away' we have to be more creative finding little breaks here and there. But especially in our self talk. I have a rocking chair that helps me feel hugged by a loving God, and rocked to sleep now and then for little power naps.
Be gentle with you today Decadian..
In response to: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
@Dec, i'll be thinking of you next Friday and the leadup. Does it still affect you? 47yrs you probably get better at it, maybe? For me its not only that she's not here, but its also that my 'earth' family who could be, are not, all of them. Yes, I know, its her B'day, not mine (as my TS would point out, and yes, the other one - "not everything is about you" - funny thing about that one is that people who point the finger have three pointing back at them self). Anyway, making headway here with house, just a quick hi
In response to: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
A MOTHERS LOVE (ha!)
25/11 (my lost girls B'day)
#MUM(tx) "Hi, whats the plan for today good day to get busy not too hot to move around your dad had his shower and discovered he left his tight socks on all night - ankle all distorted gosh heal see the cheroptist today much over due must go be kind to your self lv mum and dad
27/11 Sunday
#MUM (tx) how come your not talking whats up doc hows that little pu##y cat next door is he still trying to make friends we had a nice xmas lunch at church thursday did you have one too nice day coming up here be kind to your self take care lv mum dad
(sounds real sweet, right? but wait for it...)
#ME (tx) Just me and my girls time, you wouldn't understand, glad you have church and lots of support
#MUM (tx) didnt mean to disturb you sorry
(there it is, ouch! never fails)
#ME(tx) just ring if you want a talk
4 HRS LATER - no phone call, or reply. There it is again, Ouch! The games, it never fails. Guess she got what she wanted. My mum 😞
25/11 (my lost girls B'day)
#MUM(tx) "Hi, whats the plan for today good day to get busy not too hot to move around your dad had his shower and discovered he left his tight socks on all night - ankle all distorted gosh heal see the cheroptist today much over due must go be kind to your self lv mum and dad
27/11 Sunday
#MUM (tx) how come your not talking whats up doc hows that little pu##y cat next door is he still trying to make friends we had a nice xmas lunch at church thursday did you have one too nice day coming up here be kind to your self take care lv mum dad
(sounds real sweet, right? but wait for it...)
#ME (tx) Just me and my girls time, you wouldn't understand, glad you have church and lots of support
#MUM (tx) didnt mean to disturb you sorry
(there it is, ouch! never fails)
#ME(tx) just ring if you want a talk
4 HRS LATER - no phone call, or reply. There it is again, Ouch! The games, it never fails. Guess she got what she wanted. My mum 😞
In response to: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
Am I talking too much
In response to: Re: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
Oh wow @Former-Member. I can see why things get so messed up for you. There is nothing about you in there, even the cat next door gets a mention. You know now not to make this about you. This is her mind games. Stay strong @Former-Member you're doing good. This is just another hiccup that really says nothing about you, just her. Be kind to yourself and let this go even though it hurts and frustrates you. 💜🤗💐
In response to: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
Oh thank you @Former-Member, you 'get' it. Thank you. No mention of my girl / our girl either. Maybe she forgot, but not likely.
In response to: Sleeping too much
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
Re: Sleeping too much
Hi everyone ....
Gosh @Former-Member .... classic not-connecting-emotionally text from your mum .... so sorry it's painful for you .... but yes, all about her and the cat ....
My MIL is so like that. Was so cross with WH being emotionally awol over something a couple of days ago .... so MIL makes sunny chit-chat all over me invalidating how I feel .... but I am 30-years used to this crappola and have a mental off-switch .... on went my politeness mask .... off went my responses other than a brief nod or basic answer to a direct question. Feel for you so much ....
@Former-Member .... while I do paint, and could make a good copy of this image, this so a photo I worked into with a painting app on my iPad ... sharpened the colours in some areas, muted in others, and added in some "pencil lines" .... glad y'all like it @Former-Member @Former-Member @Former-Member .... it made my heart sing, and the colours are my favourites too ...
💗💜💙💕🌷🌷🌷
Hi @Decadian ❤️ .... hope you're feeling better soon ....
Gosh @Former-Member .... classic not-connecting-emotionally text from your mum .... so sorry it's painful for you .... but yes, all about her and the cat ....
My MIL is so like that. Was so cross with WH being emotionally awol over something a couple of days ago .... so MIL makes sunny chit-chat all over me invalidating how I feel .... but I am 30-years used to this crappola and have a mental off-switch .... on went my politeness mask .... off went my responses other than a brief nod or basic answer to a direct question. Feel for you so much ....
@Former-Member .... while I do paint, and could make a good copy of this image, this so a photo I worked into with a painting app on my iPad ... sharpened the colours in some areas, muted in others, and added in some "pencil lines" .... glad y'all like it @Former-Member @Former-Member @Former-Member .... it made my heart sing, and the colours are my favourites too ...
💗💜💙💕🌷🌷🌷
Hi @Decadian ❤️ .... hope you're feeling better soon ....
In response to: Re: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
From where I stand @Former-Member I guess she needs to grieve her granddaughter how best she chooses but she has her own daughter here who suffers greatly on these anniversary days and she should be there helping support you and validating your very real and justified emotions during this time. For me it is about you and your loss. I know it would mean the world to you if she grieved these days with you but it appears that is not how she deals with things. I just wish she would support you through this and not make it worse playing mind games. It doesn't matter how old we are we want our mum to help validate our feelings and show empathy and support for what we are feeling. I hope that I can do this with my kids even if I don't get why they are struggling emotionally. I hope I haven't overstepped the mark with this but I wanted you to know my opinion and it might help you work out things with your son as time goes on too. Take care
In response to: Re: Sleeping too much
Unknown userMember
Re: Sleeping too much
PS @Former-Member It was my last psychologist and current therapist who are teaching me about love and parental support. I didn't have much of a clue. I'm still learning about this all the time as I didn't have it role modelled either. My current therapist is helping me to learn and practice more of it with my kids too. It is helping in my relationships with them. I really hope this helps, I'm a bit scared that I've crossed a boundary but really wanted you to know your mum doesn't help much when you need it the most. I know she will always be your mum and no matter what you still love her, you just don't need to take in the hurtful stuff.
