Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.
Unknown userMember
Living and loving someone with MI presents relationship challenges and often others cannot see why we chose to stay with our partners.
Being mindful of not intruding on others stories I thought having a thread where we can share tips and encourage one another would be of value.
In response to: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Unknown userMember
@Carlachris
Don't you wish it was possible to do this 🤐 ???
In response to: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
CarlachrisSenior Contributor
In response to: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
CarlachrisSenior Contributor
Yes he can learn new tricks but not on FB. It’s a dreadful place when in crisis.
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Unknown userMember
@Carlachris
Oyster, new what you meant, thought you were using a code word 😁😁😁.
Added grief= 😔. Possible trigger???
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Unknown userMember
Hello @Carlachris 
I am sorry to hear how hopeless you are feeling around the situation with your partner. 
From what I gather, he has Aspergers and other MH Issues? Despite his developmental and/or mental health difficulties, being subject to verbal abuse is not okay. If you or anyone else he interacts with are ever feeling unsafe, I would strongly suggest for you to reach out to Crisis Services (i.e., 000 or 13 11 14).
I can hear that your partner has some level of MH supports in place - this is a good start. However, I am uncertain as to whether you have any supports for yourself? If you feel you need extra MH support it may be worth giving our help centre a call (1800 18 72 63) or using our webchat. We are open 10AM - 10PM, Monday to Friday EST. You could also contact 1800 Respect given your partner's stated anger problems and verbally abusive behaviours. I'm positive both of these services could be useful to you.
I am glad that you have been getting community support from @Mrsjones and @Former-Member. Please feel more than free to continue to reaching out for support on the SANE Forums as no-one deserves to go through what you are alone.
Kindest,
Amour_Et_Psyché
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
CarlachrisSenior Contributor
Thankyou. Thankyou so very much. I agree with all of the above. I have taken all the numbers and suggestions and written them down and hidden them from his paranoia. I needed them.
He is having a good day today and I am able to talk calmly and reasonably with him I have said everything to him that I have said to you all this morning. He agrees he needs further help.
Tomorrow we are setting his mother’s aged care financials in place via POA and then he will be transferring the POA responsibilities to me. After that he will be seeing his psychologist and hopefully the start of a new chapter. In our lives.
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
CarlachrisSenior Contributor
And of Course TODAY her will and bequeaths arrive and he is a substantial beneficiary. All good but all triggers.
One day one hour one page at a time.
thankyou for your kind understanding. I truly appreciate every word.
In response to: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
CarlachrisSenior Contributor
Gosh it’s hard sometimes. I’m thinking of you and hoping we are all able to be with our loved ones but MI has no sense or reason. Wishing you big hugs and hope.
In response to: Re: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Unknown userMember
@Mrsjones see above message, think it is for you 😁
In response to: Partners who chose to stay for the long haul
Unknown userMember
@Sophie1
Quick wave in passing, trust you & Ms S are having a lovely time with your nieces.
Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
You’ll soon be able to use one secure login to access all SANE services.
For added security, members are now required to log in with their email address and password - member names are no longer supported for logging in.
If you had a Forums account before 19 May 2026 and haven’t set up your new login yet, you'll be prompted to set up your new secure login when you sign-in.
Fields marked * are required
