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why can't I cope longer?

Unknown userMember09 Jan 2019, 10:22 pm AEDT

why can't I cope longer?

Something's not right alright... Not sure why I'm falling to pieces atm and short of listening ears. Hope someone here can put up with me.

I'm walking in circles at home... well, not literally, just can't seem to stay focused or finish anything... if I can even remember what it is I got out of the chair to do half the time...

And snappy with people, everywhere, rude even (which is so out of character for me), the slightest hint of being 'had' or criticised or misunderstood... oh boy, I just can't keep it in atm. The internal pressure cooker wants to explode & I don't know how to stop it.

I'm at the crossroads in life, moving and deciding if to bother starting again, or just quit on life / die.

And what's scary about that lately, is the thought of it doesn't make me scared anymore - like its just what I'm supposed to do. Do you think God would factor in a premature departure (suicide / depression?) like he accepts other illnesses that separate spirit & body?

Its just those kinds of dark thoughts, but not like crisis level or that, just trying to find my way, or other alternatives, something to look fwd to.... to keep me here. I can't see a future worth living & don't feel the internal resources keep fighting.

Don't tell me to run off & get antidepressants... I'm on them. Or psychotherapy - that's in progress... I think maybe I just want to be heard. Not changedchanged (disapproved of)... just cared about... Is that too much to ask from life? Oh I know God loves me and all that, but I still live on earth...

Do you know what I'm trying to say?Does anyone ever feel this way? I just feel so totally spent - the end of the line... ... ...

My two church supports are away at the moment, not that I lean on them heavy, I'm just conscious there gone...

Ha! Horrible feeling like the only close people in ya life need to take a holiday away from you, well, maybe some of the others I notice they have to deal with more, none the less - feeling abandoned 😞

2720 replies

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In response to: why can't I cope longer?

Unknown userMember13 Feb 2021, 9:32 pm AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

Hi @Eve7 - you doing ok? How's work?

In response to: Re: why can't I cope longer?

Eve7Senior Contributor13 Feb 2021, 9:35 pm AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

I’m ok thanks @Former-Member Work is good most of the time. I’m currently in Adelaide with S2 for the weekend.

In response to: why can't I cope longer?

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor13 Feb 2021, 9:35 pm AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

Good job @Former-Member .... ❣️

In response to: Re: why can't I cope longer?

AnastasiaSenior Contributor13 Feb 2021, 9:38 pm AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

I really love your photo especially the edited one. So good I'd frame it I think!!!

Glad you are home, mustn't apologise you've been out living, it's what it's all about really 😁

Glad you're home safe @Former-Member I've enjoyed your travel updates.

Love and hugs always xox

In response to: why can't I cope longer?

Unknown userMember13 Feb 2021, 9:38 pm AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

Call the midwife just started 🏥🚑🚲🚼😁👍

In response to: Re: why can't I cope longer?

Unknown userMember14 Feb 2021, 11:41 am AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

THANKS @Anastasia, @Emelia8 @F&H and all. Bit flat this morning re limitations, but will have cuppa soon. Furbub has got already got me up, gone out for p, & had cuddles, she's a beautiful distraction, hope she's not too disadvantaged being around me. Seems ok, esp when we go out for walks.
Oh well
"JUST DO THE BEST WE CAN" i guess, that's what I keep telling everyone, Most of us are. Just keep swimming...

In response to: Re: why can't I cope longer?

Unknown userMember14 Feb 2021, 11:43 am AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

In response to: Re: why can't I cope longer?

Emelia8Senior Contributor14 Feb 2021, 11:51 am AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

Hi @Former-Member

Sorry you are feeling a little flat.

Oh no EOR ... your GG dog is in no way disadvantaged by being around you. She would never choose to be anywhere other than with you. She is definitely in the right place, where she wants to be and is happy being there.

Yes ... just do the best we can ... that is all any of us can ever do. You are doing that EOR, and under the most difficult of circumstances ... so well done to you.

Emelia 💞🐶🤗

In response to: Re: why can't I cope longer?

AnastasiaSenior Contributor14 Feb 2021, 12:11 pm AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

I'm sorry that you are feeling flat dear @Former-Member , you look pretty good to me 😁

Yes, keep swimming, I do like that saying very much 🏊‍♀️

GG is definitely not disadvantaged by being around you. Personally I think she's very lucky that she has you to care for and love her. I am sure she feels this way and I reckon in truth she chose you not the other way round 🙏🐕🐾

You're a good egg EOR, very insightful and kind...don't forget that and don't let the bast&$ds tell you otherwise. Love and hugs ❤️🤗

Scuse the French

In response to: Re: why can't I cope longer?

PeriSenior Contributor14 Feb 2021, 2:19 pm AEDT

Re: why can't I cope longer?

Dear @Former-Member ,

i understand feeling flat but I don’t believe that your fur baby is at all disadvantaged being with you , in fact she loves you and can help you feel better. I am so sorry about your back and the limitations around that.

I am watching abc kids rv with my granddaughter. Some of these shows get on my nerves, but she loves the music and colours so we keep on with them.

she brightens my day but I feel flat too. But I shall get moving and hope that improves things.

peri

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