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having a bad morning

having a bad morning

I am feeling that my life at the moment is crap. I am so depressed and find that more so in the mornings. I hate myself so much, the way I feel, the way I act and behave. I know people will say to me 'oh just get over it' or 'you're not trying hard enough' - well to those people who say that: Do you have a mental illness; do you know what it's like to have depression and feel so dark that you cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel; do you self harm to get rid of your emotions and to feel the pain; or do you think about suicide because it's all too much and you can't handle the pain anymore - NO. So don't tell me to just 'move on' or 'stop being too sensitive'.

I am not having a good morning this morning; tears are flowing as i am typing. And I have to get ready for work; damn work. Sometimes I wonder if life is worth living and why?

I really don't know how i am going go today at work; I feel so depressed. 😞

1047 replies

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In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Hi @BlueBay

Chronic pain means I hardly ever really finish a task until it's time to start it again - I cleaned out a book case in my bedroom and I still haven't picked up all the books

It's so frustrating - and I understand - it seems like self-sabotage but I don't think it is - maybe it's us doing the best we can

Anyway - you missed two gym sessions - you can start your exercises again and go to the next session - I know how hard it can be - you have so much on with everything coming at you

I am a bit fragile today - and I was on line for such a short time yesterday - but I could feel everyone caring when I went into the church - then I liked the service - it was the celebration of the life of a wonderful person

Take care of yourself - only you can do this - and don't be hard on yourself - all your emotions are raw and right under the surface

Decadian

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Good norning @Decadian, @BlueBay, @Kurra, @Faith-and-Hope, @utopia xxx

sorry to hear you are feeling a bit fragile today , sending you tender hugs for today my friend

Take care of yourself @BlueBay , one day at a time xx

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Thank you so mucvh @Shaz51 xxoo

Hope you are well and your husband is okay too. Any plans for today? I have a headache again. Just came back from the doctors and my BP was 159/100, so he has changed my blood pressure meds. The sun is out and I know I should be outside but - just can't. And exercise - well that's in the too hard basket.

One day at a time that's all I can do.

@Decadian Pls be gentle, I know you are fragile. xxxooo

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

One day at a time here too @BlueBay xx

Hubby has gone back to bed for the morning

we have lots of clouds here , i think it might rain soon

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

@BlueBay. Sending you good thoughts for today. Just do 5 minutes at a time. You may decide later today to sit in the garden and just listen to the birds.
Will catch up soon.

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Hey @utopia
Drove to the beach Sitting here on the sand listening to the waves crashing. Felt overwhelmed before and started to cry but now I am calm. Just sitting.

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Way to go @BlueBay,xx I am proud of what you did to help yourself

Hubby has been in bed all morning , I was starting to feel

So I made a cuppa and went outside sitting in my unweeded garden , and as I sat there I could feel everything melt away

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

@BlueBay @Shaz51

Well done, both of you !!

❤

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

@BlueBay. Brilliant. That's a great way to kick depression and anxiety in the butt.
Love the sounds of waves. It's one of my meditation aps. No waves in the middle of Victoria.

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Thank you @utopia@Faith-and-Hope@Shaz51

I knew I would be okay once I got to the beach, it was just getting there. But I did it!!! 🙂

Once hubby gets home from work at 3pm I think we'll go down the beach again, maybe we'll have a coffee too

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