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having a bad morning

having a bad morning

I am feeling that my life at the moment is crap. I am so depressed and find that more so in the mornings. I hate myself so much, the way I feel, the way I act and behave. I know people will say to me 'oh just get over it' or 'you're not trying hard enough' - well to those people who say that: Do you have a mental illness; do you know what it's like to have depression and feel so dark that you cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel; do you self harm to get rid of your emotions and to feel the pain; or do you think about suicide because it's all too much and you can't handle the pain anymore - NO. So don't tell me to just 'move on' or 'stop being too sensitive'.

I am not having a good morning this morning; tears are flowing as i am typing. And I have to get ready for work; damn work. Sometimes I wonder if life is worth living and why?

I really don't know how i am going go today at work; I feel so depressed. 😞

1047 replies

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In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

just tried lifeline - but i couldn't do it so i hung up.

is there anyone on here to talk to?

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

I am here for a quick moment @BlueBay. I have been picking up your posts this morning. Just wanted to let you know I'm hearing you !!

Cyber-hugs ..... ❣

Got to get my D3 to the doctor now, but I will be back later.

I buy myself flowers on sad days. Can you do that too ? Or pick some from the garden ? Just for you ....

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

@Faith-and-Hope

I have some in the garden, i will go and put them in a vase. and i am about to listen to some nice music on the computer.

maybe i need some knitting, not sure if my head can concentrate though

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Hi @BlueBay

I get headaches from stress - migraine from bad stress - and I get stomach cramps which make me feel sick so I know the physical side of what you have right now

I wish you had told the doctor how bad you are feeling - but you didn't - so let that one go

About wedding anniversaries - I would have had my Golden Wedding Anniversary a few months back - but I have been divorced for a long time now and better that I am - still it was strange

But I can understand that it is your parents' wedding anniversary and your abusive brother's birthday on the same day and that is always tough - and yes - I know what they can do with that - I had to leave my family of origin - they didn't treat me with respect - neither does yours treat you with the love they seem to lack

But families - oh blast - blood is thicker than water and stickier too - we have families and sometimes they cause us pain

I get it

Decadian

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

That's it @BlueBay .... anything you can think
of to take your mind off it for the moment .... concentrate on anything else you can ....

Postpone the worry, and to do that, distract yourself from the source of worry .... there will be plenty of time to focus on it when you need to talk about it next.

Start fluffing your home for your son coming home, or prepare the lasagne ahead of time and cook it tomorrow ....

Keep busy and your thoughts distracted ....

Big hugs

❤

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Hi @BlueBay,

Sorry to hear that today has been another difficult day.

Picking some flowers sounds like a lovely idea. Listening to music and knitting as sound like good options.

Dont forget you can also call the Suicide Call Back Service if you want to talk to someone. There number again is:

Suicide Call Back Service

1300 659 467

Look after yourself this afternoon @BlueBay.

In response to: Re: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Hi @Former-Member

Put some flowers in a small vase in the kitchen. Haven't done any knitting, not in the mood. Listened to some Adele songs. But now hubby is home, kids are home and i am still not good.

Cant call suicide cal back as family are home. just can't.

may go on line to lifeline tonight and chat with them.

Work tomorrow is stressing me especially as my co-worker/friend will be there. And if i stay to myself and not talk much she will ask me questions. i just want to be left alone.

no one is listening, wish everyone would just leave me alone so i can hide away from the world.

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Hi @BlueBay. Sorry to hear of the stuff up again with your psych and the hospital. Frustrating.
So pleased that your son will be here soon. Is it tomorrow he arrives?
You have done amazingly well to cope for this long while you wait for your hospital stay.
Keep focusing on tasks that occupy your mind & body. Knitting or other craft. Going for a walk. Maybe even a bubble bath while listening to music. Keep busy. Rest when you need to. Remember to love yourself.

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Hi @utopia
My son arrives late tomorrow night at midnight. Hubby and older son will go to airport. Too late for me as I am working next day.
I don't know if I can wait another 7-10 days. I
I'm going to bed still not feeling too good. Terrible stomach pains.

In response to: having a bad morning

Re: having a bad morning

Forgot to say @utopia
Hope your day was ok. Sleep well. Chat tomorrow. Xxoo
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