FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Something’s not right

Lost and confused

Lost and confused

Hi I am new here. I had a major breakdown at my work 22 months ago, it lead to chronic severe major depressive disorder, long story short, I have spent over 100 days in hospital this year, due to severe suicidal thoughts and self harming. It was over 5 admissions, my work place of 24 years has turned on me, even though my breakdown was their fault and I am on work cover, they said some things after my first hospital admission that really hurt me, and my condition got quite a bit worse that it was alredy, which was bad enough, my self harming is almost every day now when I am not in hospital, last Monday I had to go to emergency medical attention, and even though I said I didn't feel safe they only kept me overnight. Seems I have spent too much time in hospital now and they just want to send me home asap. I see a psychiatrist every week and a psychologist every week as well, my psychiatrist also wants to keep me out of hospital, which is why I see them both weekly. I have managed not to self harm for 5 days since Monday's hospital visit, but did slip up in a minor way today, I still am, so I am not liking my chances of being able to resist the urge for too much longer. I feel like even going to emergency is a waste of time for me now, as they just want to send me home. I feel like my life is over, and I am just breathing, waking up, surviving and going back to sleep, my work place even though I am still employed there for now (haven't been there this year due to not fit to work on my certificate), they won't let me on the propery and also have banned some my workmates from talking to me, and others have just chosen to abandon me, and I miss working and miss my workmates despite their betrayal. But I can barely get through a day without a major struggle, and don't cope with any stress.

50 replies

21 - 30 of 50

In response to: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

@Appleblossom 🖐

In response to: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

@outlander I seem to be so low nothing really works for me at the moment. I can't recall one happy moment since my breakdown 22 months ago. I try distractions. Music doesn't work, I went for walks listening to music and just cried through most of the walks, and had no idea what I was listening to. I now use Audio books on my walks, and sometimes if I can focus enough it at least distracts me a bit.

I don't even care enough to stop myself from my urges a lot of the time, then I feel guilty for being so week.

In response to: Re: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

@skyehaven

Im sorry things are so rough for you.
Im glad audiobooks sometimes help you, have you found anything else helpful at all?

Your not weak for not being able to stop your sh, its often a way to cope when nothing else works but you can learn new things. The more you resist the urge and find healthier ways to cope itll start retraining your brain to use those instead of sh.
You probably think your not worthy of alot and you deserve it, whats the point in it all- am i right?
Many people experience these thoughts but that is the inner demons talking and not 'you'. Im hoping that as you work through things with your psychologist that inner demon will quiet down for you.

In response to: Re: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

@outlander I think I am a total waste of space.

I don't even know how to be nice to myself.

If it wasn't for a couple of good friends I wouldn't even be here.

But I feel like I am a burden to them, so even that's hard. I feel like I am not the person they made friends with, I know I am not great to be around

In response to: Re: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

Hi @skyehaven

Your story is very sad ... In a way it has a level of stress like ambulance officers and first responders etc ... I am outraged that your workplace did not support you before you MH deteriorated. I spent today talking with a lady who had worked in HR til retirement. She would be critical of your workplace too. However the most important thing now is to focus on recovery.

I have experienced a lot of depression and have come back to experience all level of feelings including a lot of joy.

I volunteer at a zoo where there are lots of animal lovers. It has helped me a lot especially working with the young kids 2-8. Today I felt a deep calm as I watched the children and mums ... it helped me consider the trauma 2 of my siblings and i endured when we were those ages.

Its tough to have MH issues, but there are options. Keep reaching out here and in your own life.

Take Care Apple

In response to: Re: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

Thats really hard and i can relate alot to what you just said @skyehaven

I dont think your a burden or a waste of space

Self care and compasssion is really hard to do and takes a lot of practice. Maybe start with small things like a daily goal or 2 to do something for yourself-something that you enjoy

What sorts of things do you enjoy doing or maybe theres a hobby youd like to have a go at?

In response to: Re: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

@Appleblossom our HR sat at a case conference after my first hospital stay, and said they tried everything to help me. Yet after my breakdown I worked full time, having massive meltdowns nearly every day. She lied about advising me not to go on work cover, she had told me it would be too stressful, it denied me of 12 months of extensive help. Than accused me of traumatizing other staff with my mental illness, because I was honest. I attempted to go back with a work capacity certificate that said I could enter data, the same day, she removed that role from the roster and said it wasn't available, it sent me back to hospital. She ordered people not to talk to me, isolating me from my workmates for the last 6 months . She gets away with it and I continue to get worse. Truth is she she extremely uncomfortable around me because of my mental illness, the self harming finished me

In response to: Re: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

@skyehaven I have met a few overcompensating females in the workforce. It sounds like she did have problems.

Please dont believe that self harming is the end of you. As good therapists understand more about it, there is better treatment available, but I know its not good everywhere.

I sh a lot for 12 years in my life, but not in the last 16 years.

Its a terrible thing to come from, as due to stress overloads we become our worst enemy, but its possible.

There are reasons that sh is increasing and I believe that it is social, that the individual is struggling withing their social sphere as needs are not met.

It took me a long time to grapple with the issue and often there are a few burnt bridges, but still YOU can live a full life again. What is interesting is the level of responsibility you had at work. It says a lot about you as a person, and competitiveness in the workplace is rife.

The people on this site have a lot fo different experiences and are good to talk to ...if you need to unload, or distract, or get tips or just for company.

Gently Bently with you.

In response to: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

Evening @skyehaven

I see my lil forum sister @outlander

has been sitting with you this afternoon. She's a beautiful person.

In response to: Re: Lost and confused

Re: Lost and confused

@Sans911 💜 💙
21 - 30 of 50