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It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor16 June 2018, 3:50 pm AEST

It's time I disappear

I've been struggling for awhile and today is a really bad day. I'm emotional overwhelmed angry at my BPD. Not coping. Im having thoughts to disappear fir a while where no one will find me.

I am so confused in my head.

I am thinking my family will be better off without me. I am a bother to then.

Pls tell me I'm wrong. Someone tell me to not do it.

Ir seems wrong but my head is telling me very strongly to do it.

Easilt psck a bag and go.

Fragile is how I feel.

97 replies

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In response to: It's time I disappear

KobeCatSenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:06 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Hi @BlueBay

KobeCat here, one of the moderators for the next few hours.... Just checking in and letting you know that I am around.

Let me know in email how I can best support you tonight

Kobe x

In response to: It's time I disappear

Sans911Senior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:06 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Beautiful posts @Missmylife

Such lovely things to say💕💕💕

In response to: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:12 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Thankyou @Sans911

I didn't realise you had BPD too. It's just a hard disorder isn't it?

thsnkyou for your honesty. I appreciate your comments.

I am so confused. I just need time. Snd I'm so exhausted. I have no energy been feeling very tired all day. Early night tonight.

Did I read somewhere that you're in hospital?

BB xxoo

In response to: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:17 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

You're so nice and kind @Missmylife

thankyou I am happy that you have chatted with me and gave me some valuable support and reasons why not to leave.

I'm happy to chat agsin with you. Yes smother 24 hrs may change my way of thinking. I hope so.

You take care too

BB xx

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:19 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Hi @KobeCat

do I use the same email that @candycane sent me earlier?

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

AppleblossomSenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:23 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

@BlueBay

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:26 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Thankyou lovely @Appleblossom

❤️ BB xxoo

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

Sans911Senior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:27 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

It's @Snowie

who's in hospital @BlueBay

but I don't think she has bpd. I'm not sure.

I get those really intense times of confusion. It feels really overwhelming. And like @Missmylife

has said, give yourself time. And lots of self care. Watch a movie, sit in the sun, eat something, take a nice long shower, and rest. Lots of rest. With so much going on in your head, it's easy to be exhausted. I used to fight it all the time, but now I give into the exhaustion. Things I need to do take longer, and I do things in little chunks of time, but all those things will be there tommorrow and the next day and next week. Just focus on you.

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

BlueBaySenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:31 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Thankyou again @Sans911

I appreciate your support. I need some time fir myself to rest my mind and body. It's been too messed up all week and I'm too exhausted. Chat agsin soon Thsnks agsin lovely ❤️

BB xx

In response to: Re: It's time I disappear

KobeCatSenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:37 pm AEST

Re: It's time I disappear

Hi @BlueBay

Yes, the moderators all use the same email.

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