Living with Ourselves

Hugs @Sophia1 ,

Take as long as you need to. We are here for when you are ready.

Please take care.

its All Good @Sophia1 take it easy

@Sophia1

All good.

Take all the time you need

hi @Sophia1 yes i know what you mean re fish swimming in a bowl, that is a good analogy to describe me too.

yes mum is very excited about having the house all finished, it has only taken us 30 years to get there, lol. but we have almost made it. i just hope mum gets to enjoy it a bit.

thank you for trusting me, i too have been hurt over and over and i struggle with trust too, it takes me a very long time to fully trust someone, and i only allow a very small circle of people into my life. and i push people away if i feel they are not for me.

im so happy you are getting over covid and your fall. our physical health is so troublesome sometimes. my mum has blood clots and she is getting treatment for it, that is why i had a really bad breakdown a few weeks ago, i learned i am never going to be able to cope if anything happens to her.

life is not turning out how i hoped but it is what it is and i have to accept my fate. i had to tell my partner i would never be able to be with her because i will not be able to cope without mum, my partner is devistated.

i hope you have a nice day and have found some happyness and peace today.

hugs my friend.

Jacques.

Hard rain on a dumpster bin lid. Bitter cold shakes me from fragile sleep. Macdonalds pickles and ciggy butts stuck on the side of my neck. Green meat sweet n sour smell of discarded pet shop puppies,

executed for failing to be loved. Why can't I wake from my damp lane dumpster nightmares of lives past lived.

Gentle hands upon me. Orderly faces, fussing, speaking in tongues of clinical Latin

I must still be alive. Finally, a dream. Do the dead dream. Induced coma say they. Months succumbed

to seconds, I, to infection, the bookkeeper to covid, and the country to a parched and polarized landscape. And what of all of you dear folk.

The good news. I'm told they saved my arm. Unaware it was even imperilled. I can soon have visitors, . . this side of the glass, and my beloved bookkeeper is safe. Thankyou so much to all that kept posting and held me in thought.

Last I remember is spirals of @Appleblossom ,s falling like snow on @Owlunar ,s garden of tiny little plants, and @Oaktree keeping @TAB ,s on everyone like a loyal mother hen. Old posts revisit

like ghosts in the night Warm breath on dying embers throw flickers of hope on dark walls, still supports after all this time. Thankyou so much. @Sophia1 could that really be you. My good hand wont part with my shiny little harmonica again, so nurse reluctantly types.

When crisp porcelain thoughts, neatly pressed and folded, return one day, so shall I.

My warmest wishes and thanks to All my friends that helped me and endured me on Sane.

@StuF @LeChuck @EternalFlower @Shaz51 @TideisTurning @amber22 @Thyme well . . just everyone. thankyou.

https://youtu.be/qM0zINtulhM?si=0MYm60w2Z3ikqQbz

'The rumours of my death have been greatly exaggerated' Mark Twain or was the Tony S from dumpster lolo..

https://youtu.be/dOsmG-sufNc?si=3j3JXdEsbmGjUiNw

@tonys lol .. Lazarus from burns ward .. ?..

https://youtu.be/byki-TXAK1U?si=gFGToCFgFNLxcCeO

@tonys leaving hospital .................

https://youtu.be/d5FTmyzn9vc?si=_KY2GskZvH5KuolR

okay last one ..

..who can it be now ..?? lol @tonys

TO @TAB . The only person who's bad taste most definatley rivals my own, thankyou

Now old friend, doc says I need to take refuge from the waves of a brain swell. Machines can do my breathing for me. The velvet glove of night welcomed via my drip feed. Goodnight all... tonys moon base 1