Any recoverying alcoholic or alcoholic in the forum

Good work, @Bubbles3

One day at a time, as they say in AA (I find this saying useful for life in general!)

Hello @Bubbles3

I'm an alcoholic {and substance abuser}, though I haven't had a drop for near 10 years. I think I used it to let the anger out, particularly to partners. Because I was too much of a coward to face them with problems sober. I was really very bad on it and did the most stupid things. I kind of swapped it for coffee, I never used to drink the stuff but now I'm an absolute addict 🙂 And I'd have to say, if I have to have an addiction, coffee is much better; it may still harm me but it doesn't cause me to harm others. But I still fight the craving, well it's almost like an instinctive need, every moment of every day - especially when things go wrong! I tried to stop many, many times - don't give up trying, just because you may slip here and there, does not mean you have failed. Just the fact that your trying, that you are honestly looking at how it affects you and those around you . . . actually means you have succeeded!!! I think it helps to realize {I don't mean to be triggering} that it never 'goes away', once an addict always an addict . . . but it does get easier, though that takes time, and the amount of time that will take, will depend on individual circumstances. I think now days I kind of look down upon people that drink (maybe I need to, so that I don't), I think unless someone can decide to never touch another drop for the rest of their life, they're alcoholics - just under-the-radar ones - more socially acceptable. Though I don't say anything, the Center of my Universe has a lot of drinking and substances going on. I often look at my child and see a reflection of me, and think, is that how I changed your brain in the first 10 years of your life - is that what I taught you? But the fact that my child still loves me despite thier upbringing, reassures me that I wasn't all bad. They know me better than anyone else on this Planet and understand me like no-one else does, and yet I have no doubts about their love {though I doubt just about everything else!}.

Sending you strength and courage, but most importantly congratulations and pride

i tried AA but didnt work for me. i believe i can do it by my slef. i have always believed that even when i first started to give up. i dont the "higher power" or "god" or "spiritual power" to do what i need to do.
yes it may work work for other people , dont get me wrong, other people find it helpful but not me.

i have to do it own way , thats the only way you learn, and thats what i think

@@gypsylee

@Bubbles3 Yeah I’ve only been to AA on and off. I do find it helpful but I have such bad social anxiety I spend most of the meeting dreading being asked to share! Most of my detox/withdrawals have been in hospital because of the Pancreatitis so I’ve never even been to rehab.

Has anyone read a book called This Naked Mind?

@-Rayne- No, but I just looked it up and it sounds very good. My mind sure felt naked when I stopped drinking!

@gypsylee I've just started it. It was recommended to me by someone who said it totally removed her need/urge/desire to drink. Sounds pretty unbelievable but I'm giving it a go... hard not to with a claim like that!