Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away: No responses please

In consultation with another DES person –

My DES Job Coach has asked me to make a decision to Resign from the Traffic Control Job, or return to Traffic Shifts (Work) –

- On Christmas Eve, Friday 24th December (at the end of next week), after only having worked 3 days in a Temporary Parks & Gardens Job (Starting on Wednesday 22nd Dec)

- A Temp position that may only last 6 weeks, until February 2022.

This directly Contradicts my Psychologist's advice + the advice/ support of several other people.

My Psychologist had advised me to make myself Unavailable for 2 weeks for the Casual Traffic Control Job - Whilst I see if I can manage the Temp Parks & Gdns Job, & whether it might last longer than just a few weeks.

The DES Job Coach put the pressure back onto me, & put me back into the immediate dilemma (requiring immediate decision) – That I was advised I could avoid, was advised by several people that was unnecessary to be in.

I feel I am being held accountable over this job decision by at least 3 or 4 different people (& organisations) – Which is not reasonable.

This “accountability” & competing insistence is the cause of the dilemma & overwhelm – Not so much the Job choice itself.

In other words, this has made things worse, unnecessarily.

Adge

I cried in the dark and my cry was wiped out

how can some formites are allowed to talk of death, incest etc and yet when I speak of my recent self harm the moderators cancel my voice?? It makes pea very sad and angry.

@Bunniekins Your post was restrained, personal, brief and not at all glamourising or lurid. I thought it should have stayed up, but once they make a decision they rarely reverse it.

@Appleblossomthank you Apple

Hello @Bunniekins , @Appleblossom

and other members visiting the thread.

I acknowledge and agree with your comment @Bunniekins

"how can some formites are allowed to talk of death, incest, {self caused death, and support for, in general terms} etc and yet when I speak of my recent self harm the moderators cancel my voice?? It makes pea very sad and angry."

Words in text of quote above, coloured purple, added by me, HenryX

and yours @Appleblossom

"@greenpea Your post was restrained, personal, brief and not at all glamourising or lurid. I thought it should have stayed up, but once they make a decision they rarely reverse it."

Having been in a similar situation and having had a number of comments removed, the reasons for some of which I acknowledged and could understand. I believed that the comment and content in one of my recent posts, that was removed, was pertinent and relevant to the situation and was respectful - the latter, ie., "being disrespectful", having been given as the grounds and reason for removal of the post. The reason for removal of that comment, did not appear to me to match the content of the comment and post, or the context in which it was presented.

Personally, I think that some of the decisions made, are made "as if with blinkers on", i.e., not seeing the particular comment in the context of the whole conversation or the established relevance to the situation or person(s) concerned.

To offer a balancing perspective, whether both of you, other members or I agree with the decisions made, we have agreed to comply with certain guidelines and the "decisions of the umpires", whether we agree with the application of those guidelines, by moderators, or the reasons for which certain decisions have been made, or otherwise. It may also be a question of "the eye of the beholder".

There are certainly issues and, I believe, problems in the structure of the forum site, with regard to use, access and applied interpretations, as well as questions about consistency in the application of the Guidelines & Info, about which I have already spoken. I have been less "vocal" of late because I sensed a certain resistence to, and even push-back against my comments and concerns, even when attempting to find out what difficulties, intending and newer members and even older members have in using the site. There appears to be a code of self-defensiveness about the status quo.

With My Very Best Wishes

to all

@HenryX

Hi @Bunniekins @Appleblossom @HenryX,

Just jumping in here to let you know I hear your concerns, and also acknowledge that it can bring up some big feelings when posts are removed. I'm really sorry to hear the impact this has had for you all, your feelings are completely valid. As much as we can, we want all members to be able to share their experiences as openly as possible.

Unfortunately, the nature of an online and public facing forums means that we do have to think more broadly about the impact for all people (reading and posting), which is why we have community guidelines, and at times need to make tough decisions about what content is on the forums. As moderators and peer workers, it's one the hardest parts of our job to remove posts, because we know that every person is reaching out for help. To keep the space safe for everyone, there are times we have to remove or edit content in line with our guidelines.

We are always reviewing our processes and adjusting our ways of moderating, and we are open to your feedback if you would like to provide it. You are more than welcome to email me at team@saneforums.org, or submit your feedback through our feedback form.

@Bunniekins I am sorry to hear how you are feeling, and can understand the confusion. If you think it would be helpful, I am happy to review the post, and provide some more context to the decision? Please let me know if this is something you would like

@HenryX HenryX I always appreciate the amount of work you put into your posts. I may not be able to read them all due to my mi but when I do the posts show what an intelligent and thoughtful individual you are. Thank you for your support. Love peax

@Daisydreamer Hi Daisydreamer yes I would like you to review the post please. I would like it to be compared to some other posts which have been posted lately which have been imho very triggering and yet have not been taken off.