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Something’s not right

not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

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In response to: not coping

NatureLoverSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

No, your kids would absolutely not be better off without you. How do I know? Because of hearing and reading too many stories of damaged kids without their mothers, who only wanted their own mothers, warts and all. @Lee82

In response to: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

Not taking over here @Lee82 you can still talk here anytime. You are of course not coping well as the threada titled 💜💜

In response to: Re: not coping

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

I suppose I just can't seem to see it that way @NatureLover

I was brought up in a house where there was a lot of physical abuse and a lot of mental issues and I swore I would never put my kids through the same thing and here I am doing the same thing. I can't help but hate myself for it.
Im so sorry @NatureLover I feel like I am whinging and I don't mean to put this all on you.

In response to: Re: not coping

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

Thank you @outlander I appreciate that.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

Im mostly tired today @Lee82 ive set myself a goal of doing 4 rows of the crochet (prib about an hr and a half work there) ive done too but just giving my hand a break. I done 8 rows yesterday. Im really trying to get this thing done but the bigger it gers the longer just one row takes. I have 46 rows to go yet. 🤦‍♀️

Also your kids arent better off without you. Even though my mother is well not quite a mother i wouldn't want her going anywhere!

In response to: Re: not coping

Lee82Senior Contributor

Re: not coping

I think setting yourself a realistic daily goal is a great idea to get through it hun. If today you don't get what you set out to get done it's all ok. Just don't push yourself too much. It is good of you to be doing this for your Aunty in the first place so she will just have to wait until you are ready babe.

thank you for your kind words @outlander I don't want to feel this way but I can't help but feel this way at the moment.

In response to: Re: not coping

NatureLoverSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

You're not putting anything on me, @Lee82 ...I asked if you wanted to talk... I'm just so sorry to hear where you find yourself, in such a painful place.

I'm sorry, I have a regular scheduled video chat call thing now...I will be away for about an hour.

Sending you both warm hugs @Lee82 and @outlander

In response to: Re: not coping

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

Big Big Hugs @outlander

Lovely to see you and have you "in my life".

Hey @Lee82 Parenting is such a huge gig. 24/7 for at least 20 years. So we do need to have tolerance for ourselves and the parents who went before us. Often we react and go in an opposite direction when we have seen horrible behaviours and things ... but all behaviour occurs in in context. Managing pressure and expectations takes a lot of work.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

Im only 2 rows away from the goal. I wont get it done before i get the kids but i only need to pick them up today. Mum will get home about half hr after i pick them up so i dont have to be there all night. @Lee82

Of course you dont want to feel that way. I dont think anyone would but atm that's the way your feeling and we are here to help you through it 💛

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not coping

@NatureLover i hope your video chat goes well ❤
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