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not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor04 Aug 2017, 8:11 pm AEST

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

18135 replies

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In response to: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 7:31 pm AEST

Re: not coping

i even considered getting a carer in overnight but i know pop wont cope with that either @Snowie he will think im sick and the worlds ending and keep forgetting that the carer is here so will panic and think they are taking him to a nursing home or something. its so frustrating.

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 7:41 pm AEST

Re: not coping

It sounds frustrating @outlander and a lot of pressure put on your shoulders. It is so hard to care for someone else, and especially when that person relies on you so much.

In response to: not coping

NatureLoverSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 7:43 pm AEST

Re: not coping

@outlander wrote:
i was hoping the new carer that i arranged through my aged care would be helpful but even after 2 sessions it hasnt been helpful and i have to deal with so much backlash and fall out after the carer has left its hard to deal with. i was going to see if i could get a day off on the day of the procedure including the night but i know that wont happen and pop wont cope if i even asked him to stay with family for the night or something just so i can have a few hours and not be questioned and interuppted all the time. @Snowie

Sorry to hear this 😞 I so wish you could get that day and night off @outlander

Thanks for asking how I am - I'm upset tonight, so many people so ill, so I think I'll sign off shortly and go to bed early. You are a sweet person, @outlander . I hope your night is a bit better tonight. ❤️

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 7:46 pm AEST

Re: not coping

maybe itll get better over time as in he might accept the help thats being offerred @Snowie atm he is in the denial stage where he kind of knows something may not be right but doesnt want to accept it or know anything about it so either gets upset or angry and often takes it out on the person closest to him. honestly sometimes its like hes 2 different people. when they are here its so good (providing im nearby) but when they leave its totally opposite.

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 7:53 pm AEST

Re: not coping

He may or may not accept the help but that doesn't make it easier for you in the now hun. And I know the person closet to him is normally you @outlander You have to put up with so much

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 8:00 pm AEST

Re: not coping

thank you @NatureLover
im sorry your upset tonight, do you want to have a chat? you can talk here if you like i dont mind

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 8:03 pm AEST

Re: not coping

yeah i know @Snowie i really need some things now. i know i can pressure him or anything but those 2 hours a week without me having to worry about him would be good but instead right now its another chore. i have to juggle everything and him even though this is suppose to be my time. the carer did their best but i think maybe if pop doesnt warm up to him after a few more sessions i might request someone else and see if theres a different reaction. perhaps he will react better to a female carer. i picked this guy cause he has alot of interested as pop, he has only had 2 sessions to get to know him though so maybe ill try to get him to do one of the shared hobbies and try leaving and see if i can get away with that.

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 8:20 pm AEST

Re: not coping

A shared hobby might be a good idea @outlander

It does put more pressure on you when you don't have that break.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 8:23 pm AEST

Re: not coping

@Snowie 💙

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor28 June 2020, 8:31 pm AEST

Re: not coping

It is time for me to go to bed hun. I hope you get some sleep tongiht @outlander It has been lovely catching up with you. I hope you get some sleep tonight sis 💜💛💙

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