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Something’s not right

not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor04 Aug 2017, 8:11 pm AEST

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

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In response to: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor28 Oct 2023, 3:48 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

At any age, I think they have to own their words @tyme

If my kids said something like that then they would have to apologise and mean it. They would also have a consequence for their actions. They need to learn that even if they are angry that words hurt. Sometimes I think words are more powerful than actions.

I'm not sure if you can talk to her mum about what she said.

In response to: Re: not coping

tymeModerator28 Oct 2023, 4:08 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

I spoke to my sister briefly, but I think I will speak to her again. I like how you put it, in that kids (or all people) need to own their own words @Snowie .

I need her to understand that words hurt. At the same time, I don't want to do it in a punishing way. She's mature enough to get it. At the moment, I'm just staying away from her.

Anyway.... are you doing anything for the remainder of the day?

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor28 Oct 2023, 4:19 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

Distance might be good for now @tyme

But I would certainly speak to her mum.

I haven't got much planned for the rest of the day. H is away and son going to friends house, so just daughter and I home. Will probably just hang out on here. Not much sleep last night equals no motivation.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor28 Oct 2023, 6:45 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

hey @tyme

im sorry your feeling hurt by your neice. kids can be pretty cruel sometimes but at 7 they should be learning right from wrong and learning to own the things theyve said. some space might be good for now. hopefully you can get her to understand that the things she says is hurtful. sometimes a talk with the child can be helpful enough, maybe she doesnt really realise the impact of saying these things to you or to anyone-if shes saying it to you then theres a high chance shes saying it to other people too.

@Snowie yes pretty much. im just holding onto hope. thats all i have to do for now. i think if i loose hope ill be in abit of trouble but i just need to keep that inside and know change is coming-i dont know when exactly but it is coming and ive finally put steps in place that theres some progress now. i cant wait to commit more to this new company. i really enjoy working for them even though its tiring. better boss, better team, better job in general.
ive done the horses and now just sorting dinner out. showers besides my own are done too.
ive paid my air bnb for my time away and left a deposit for my helpers. i think ive almost saved enough. still a fair bit to go but i have paid off more then i thought so far.

In response to: Re: not coping

SnowieSenior Contributor28 Oct 2023, 6:50 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

At least it is a step in the right direction for you @outlander I'm sure the change will come soon, you deserve it.

Good that you have almost paid it of hon. Must be a bit of weight lifted from your shoulders.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor28 Oct 2023, 7:53 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

it is a relief @Snowie still abit to pay off yet but i had more saved then i originally worked out.

only have 4 weeks left to save now

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor29 Oct 2023, 9:04 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

@tyme my admission is in 4 weeks time now and is approaching quite quickly. im starting to get pretty nervous about it.

In response to: Re: not coping

tymeModerator29 Oct 2023, 9:09 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

Will you be able to use the internet of go on the forums during your treatment? @outlander As a form of support. It'd be good to see how you are going.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor29 Oct 2023, 9:15 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

i do have access to the internet @tyme but itll depend on how im going i think. it was very isolating last time but when the treatment got to abit higher doses i was basically blind. i wasnt able to see and my eyes hurt to much to try and type anything. i also expereinced some hallucinations so i wasnt comfortable being on the forums then incase i wrote someting reavealing or distressed anyone (when in that state theres not much i remember properly or have control over words and actions so i was mindful of that as well)
but in the early stages i can check in and when i get home but it might be up to 2 weeks before i can log in or if i do it may only be very briefly

In response to: Re: not coping

tymeModerator29 Oct 2023, 9:20 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

Please remember to let us know how you are going, even if it is via email team@saneforums.org

I hope it goes okay. It sounds like a tough journey ahead. Know that we will be thinking of you. @outlander

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.