not coping

Fair enough @outlander . I'm thinking whether you can tell them to keep your resume for the future? @outlander Perhaps they may not be in a position to hire you now, rather than because of your qualifications and experience?

Do you think so?

@tyme the only thing that stopped it was the concern about conflict of interest.
they are still keeping my resume and she said that she still wants to continue to think about it. she said if she can get written NDIS clearance that i am able to work there despite a conflict of interest then she would feel better about hiring me.

Yes. Perhaps when the company grows, it will make a difference @outlander . I acknowledge it still hurts.

I'm here if you need a chat.

hopefully @tyme

i lost control of my emotions and sh urges last night

Hugs @outlander .

Hold on to the fact that it was not the right 'time', not because you didn't have the qualifications.

When you get it at the right time, it will work.

I'm here for a chat.

i hope so @tyme

i feel like im just circling the drain. i know that ive taken some good steps forward but just when i think im actually starting to get somewhere there are more set backs.

i feel so stuck here and i cant make anything move faster. its getting quite frustrating because im not just one to walk away but i dont want to wait another year to start moving forward with moving into my own place and being able to have the freedom to work where and when i like without having to rely on others to look after an attached family member.

i feel guilty for being selfish but its time for me to move on and take some steps in life and actually stick with it this time and not give in to family pressures

my urges have also been really strong and im finding myself giving into them abit more the last couple of days. my coping strategies dont seem to be working with the strength they are coming at. ive had them managed for a couple of months but i feel like everything is just tipping me over the edge and y tolerance to being able to cope has gone right down now

thanks @Snowie i just feel like everything inside my is crumbling but there isnt anything i can do about it.
i thought i was going pretty well but then something overly testy comes along and im all of a sudden not. or maybe im just use to hiding it so well now. i tend to ignore my urges or my panic attacks but maybe i shouldve paid attention to them earlier