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Something’s not right

not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor04 Aug 2017, 8:11 pm AEST

not coping

im not coping

i cant handle all of these things

besides my mental health deteriorating so dramatically, and my physicall health floating up the creek

and now within the past few hours

my great grandmother now is in a nursing home and they dont know how long she has left and to make thigns worse i think i have to put my beleoved horse down.

we just had vets out and spend the last 4 hours trying to save my horse. its been 2 hours and went back to check on her and its not looking good.

not good at all 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞 😞

i dont know what to do or how to feel, im a complete mess 😞

18135 replies

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In response to: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor12 Nov 2021, 10:35 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

is anyone around to talk to? im trying to weigh up some options but need another brain to help me

In response to: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor12 Nov 2021, 10:36 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

@Sans911

In response to: Re: not coping

Sans911Senior Contributor12 Nov 2021, 11:39 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

I'm here lil Sis @outlander

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor12 Nov 2021, 11:41 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

@Sans911 💙

In response to: Re: not coping

Sans911Senior Contributor12 Nov 2021, 11:45 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

What is it about the potential job that has you concerned @outlander? Is that you think you can't do it, or are you considering just because it's money you need?

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor12 Nov 2021, 11:52 pm AEDT

Re: not coping

I dont really want to do it @Sans911 i just need more income ans actual work experience like normal people. But not sure if this one is right for me. Im not one for providing personal hygeine care. And i would be on my own for my shifts helping 3 patients in a group home

In response to: Re: not coping

Sans911Senior Contributor13 Nov 2021, 12:00 am AEDT

Re: not coping

That could ending being hard work depending on their level of disability.

You have a few options to consider though. You could cancel the interview. Wait for something else to come along. You could go to the interview-you don't have the job yet, so it could be good experience. Or you coukd go the interview, see if you got the job. If after a couple of weeks you don't like it, then leave.

I know in the past you've talked about nursing. You would be providing personal care all the time, including showering, dressing, dental hygiene, etc. Is that something now you don't feel is right for you?

Is there anything else you could do? Like night fill at a supermarket, retail assistant, pharmacy assistant? Something less personal.

@outlander

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor13 Nov 2021, 12:08 am AEDT

Re: not coping

The interviews tomorrow. Ive spoken to the boss on the phone but we've agreed to actually meet in person and she will show me the care facility. @Sans911

I dont really want to do the more intimate hygeine things. I dont mind talking to them, cooking,cleaning and helping them in all other ways but im not keen on it. This place is more low key care, just need help with some things but its more mental support etc.
Id only considered this one because someone i know works there and said its fairly straightforward and all the men are nice and generally easy going. It also means i dont have to spend 6-8 hrs on my foot.
A few people have said itll be easy but it feels like a massive jump for me being a first real job. I havent had expetience working with one client outside of pop or horses let alone 3, plus admin work and id be on my own after 2 or 3 buddy shifts. Alot of the people who work their have experience with working in nursing homes or home support but i dont have that

In response to: Re: not coping

Sans911Senior Contributor13 Nov 2021, 12:20 am AEDT

Re: not coping

You might surprise yourself @outlander. You have a LOT of experience. You take care of your pop's needs, which isn't easy at all. You've taken care of your sisters needs for many years. It might need be as bad as you imagine. And sometimes personal care could be simple stuff like setting up the shower for them, getting them clean clothes. Might not even be washing them. It's surprising after a while you get used to seeing people without a stitch on, and you think nothing of at all. It's a body, that is all. Perhaps you could discuss this concern with the interviewer.

I think you underestimate your own abilities. Even after all my years of nursing experience I am so anxious going to an interview, then the first few shifts in a new setting. It never goes away. You're always learning.

In response to: Re: not coping

outlanderSenior Contributor13 Nov 2021, 12:26 am AEDT

Re: not coping

Cant handle 🤮 or :pile_of_poo:. Thats my main worry. Its a bad weakness of mine. I dont care if i need to help someone shower or get changed which apparently they can all do quite well, just might need help with shirt buttons or something. The toileting for one person though. I dont really know.

Shes not concerned i dont have aged care qualifications because i have alot through lived experience. I mentioned i dont do :pile_of_poo: well and she said if i can handle what comes out of a horse then i can handle what comes out of a person but its def not the same thing @Sans911

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Torres Strait Islander flag

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.